


Storms

by TheRealKags



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Bullying, Custody Battle, Divorce, Family Drama, Gen, Hinata Is Scared Of Storms, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Neglect, Late Night Conversations, M/M, Mentioned Physical Abuse, Mentioned Verbal Abuse, Night Terrors, POV Kageyama, Panic Attacks, Phone Calls, Self-Harm, Violence, implied kagehina, kageyama is a good friend, this started as a tumblr prompt and escalated quickly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-24
Updated: 2018-04-15
Packaged: 2018-08-10 20:16:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 28
Words: 30,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7859695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRealKags/pseuds/TheRealKags
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"The storm may pass, but sometimes the damage it leaves is just as bad as the storm itself."</p><p> </p><p>***TW- read the tags<br/>***Rating because of some minor language</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The First Call

**Author's Note:**

> PFFT IM NOT A DAY LATE YOU ARE

Kageyama was just about to go to sleep. It had been a long day, and he was just out for a run when the rain began to pour. He was tired and he was still cold from the rain and wind even though he was mostly dry by now, so he turned his light off and set his alarm- ugh, it was already 1:30- and snuggled under the covers. He lay there, just on the edge of sleep when he was interrupted.

His phone was ringing.

He ignored it and tried to go back to sleep, but less than a minute later, it rang again. He picked it up and saw that it was Hinata. Why would that dumbass be calling him at almost 2 in the morning? This better be good.

"What'dya want, dumbass," he said groggily.

"H-hey..." came the voice on the other end.

Was this really Hinata? The voice seemed... quiet. Scared.

"I'm just-" he was cut off by a loud clap of thunder, and Kageyama could hear a whimper on the other end of the phone.

"You okay," he asked.

"I-I'm just... I'm home alone right now and... I don't know, I just get nervous I guess?"

He was home alone? No wonder he was nervous- the storm was loud and even Kageyama's dad was still awake, just in case they were advised to take shelter for tornadoes or something. Honestly, Kagayama would be scared in that situation, too.

"Where's your family?"

"Well, Natsu's at my aunt's house, and my mom's on another business trip... I think... I don't know, I lose track of her sometimes," he finished with a nervous laugh.

Loses track of his mother? Okay, that was odd.

"You scared?" he asked.

He heard Hinata splutter a little bit. "What? Pfft... No! Of course not!"

But then there was another loud bang and Hinata yelped.

"Okay," he said. "Maybe a little."

Kageyama scoffed. "Okay. Well, if not, I'd like to get back to sleep."

"No, no! Wait," Hinata said, panic evident in his voice. "Can you please talk to me for a while? Just until the weather calms down a little?"

Kageyama sighed. He never actually intended to hang up on the spiker.

"Sure," he replied.

"Good, thanks."

"You should turn on a weather channel," Kageyama suggested. "My dad is watching it now just in case they ask us to take shelter."

"Okay."

He heard some shuffling on the other end and added, "Just make sure you keep your phone charged. Just in case the power goes out."

"Good idea," Hinata replied.

He heard the other boy's footsteps and what was probably him sitting on the couch and turning on the television.

"Oh no," he said. "There's a big red blob over us!"

"That just means the storm's bad," Kageyama said. "Calm down. It could be worse."

They sat in silence before Kageyama asked, "How do you lose track of your mother?"

Hinata was the quietest he'd ever heard the boy be until he said, "She leaves a lot. She usually drops my sister off with a friend or family member and then takes off to do whatever. I'm not really sure what she does and frankly, I don't really want to know, either."

Kageyama was saddened by this. He'd always had supportive parents and he pitied the small boy for not having anyone reliable. He didn't ask about Hinata's father because he hadn't even been brought up, causing Kageyama to assume he was out of the picture for whatever reason.

"It's really not that big of a deal though," the redhead continued after Kageyama's silence. "I mean, it's been like this for three years. I'm used to it by now."

"Alright," Kageyama replied quietly. "Keep an eye on the weather. They might advise people in different areas to take cover."

"Yeah, sounds like a- eek!" The middle blocker shrieked.

"What happened," Kageyama demanded.

"Th-the power's out!"

"Okay, calm down. It makes sense since you live on a freaking mountain."

"Yeah," Hinata said, calmer now.

"How's your phone battery?"

"All charged. Can you keep an eye on the weather for me?"

Kageyama sighed before getting up and going downstairs to where his father was watching the news.

"You didn't have to come out," his father said. "I've got an eye on- who're you on the phone with?"

Kageyama lowered the phone from his head and said, "a friend from volleyball. He's home alone and he's kinda freaking out. Then his power went out and he asked me to watch the weather for him."

His father nodded before asking, "Why's he home alone? Where are his parents?"

Kageyama, knowing it wasn't his place to say the truth, just said they were "out." He sat next to his dad and continued talking to Hinata who was thanking him profusely.

"Why'd you call me instead of your mom?"

"Well... uh... she's busy. She probably wouldn't even answer."

"Why wouldn't she answer her son in the middle of a storm? Especially knowing he's alo-"

"I just told you she's busy," Hinata snapped.

They both fell into silence after that, Kageyama's father looking at him with concern in his eyes. He shook his head signifying that he wasn't sharing.

"What's the weather like?" Hinata asked, breaking the silence.

"Do you have a basement?"

"Y-yeah, why?" The middle blocker sounded scared.

"I was just wondering in case you had to take cover. Nothing big is happening right now."

"Why hasn't your power gone out?"

"Well," Kageyama said. "Maybe it's because I don't live on a mountain."

"Shut up, Bakageyama." He could practically hear the boy sticking his tongue out.

They continued to talk about volleyball and school, Hinata gasping whenever thunder crashed, until the storm settled down to a normal rain. After assuring Kageyama he'd be okay, boys went to bed.

\-----

Hinata missed practice and was late to class the next day because of a landslide that occurred on the mountain road he lived on. He came in and immediately went to Kageyama.

"Thanks for everything," he said.

Kageyama stood there in silence a second, then answered with a, "no problem, dumbass."

Hinata was walking away when Kageyama caught his attention. The taller took a deep breath before speaking.

"If you're alone often, you could always come to my house," he said, avoiding the older boy's eyes. "Like, especially if you know it's gonna storm, or something. Or if you just get tired of being alone. My parents would be fine with it."

There was silence after that and Kageyama reluctantly looked up to Hinata's face. The redhead was sporting a large smile and bright eyes, radiating pure happiness.

"Thanks," he said. "That means a lot."


	2. A Sleepover

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata takes Kageyama up on his offer.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay so i wasn't planning on adding onto this, but i'm doing it on a whim so this could be complete crap.

A week after the first incident, Hinata actually decided to take Kageyama up on his offer.

"Kageyama," he said while they were running before practice. "Can I come over?"

Kageyama was quiet for a while, almost as if he didn't hear him. 

"I mean," Hinata continued. "Only if it's okay with you and your parents. I just don't feel like being alone today... Especially since they're saying it'll storm aga-"

"You don't have to explain yourself, dumbass," Kageyama said. "I said you could come whenever, and I meant it."

When practice was done, it was already raining. Kageyama was calling his mother to ask if she could pick them up, but Hinata was already starting to walk. 

"Where are you going?" Kageyama asked. 

"I thought we were walking," Hinata replied, confused. 

"Not in the rain, we're not," Kageyama said. "My mom's coming soon."

Hinata looked a bit surprised, responding with a simple "oh."

Kageyama's mother was a chipper woman, surprisingly almost as short as Hinata. She was almost the complete opposite of Kageyama and, if it wasn't for her raven hair and ocean blue eyes, you'd never guess she was his mother. 

When they got into the car, Hinata asked if they could stop by his house so he could get a change of clothes. When they got there, they pulled up to a modest looking house, with a feeble attempt at a garden in the front. Hinata dashed inside and left the door open, rain going into the house, before running back to close it with a bright smile. He was back in a flash with a small duffle bag that had clothes in it. 

They went to Kageyama's house, a nice, tidy home, and the two boys went upstairs just as lightning began to strike. Hinata jumped three feet into the air at the first, unexpected boom. Kageyama snickered. 

"Don't laugh at me, Bakageyama!"

"Well, maybe you should grow up," Kageyama replied, Hinata sticking his tongue out in return. 

They tried to do homework, but Hinata would jump at every strike of lightning and his hand would shoot across the paper, making marks everywhere. 

"I'm just gonna take a break," Hinata said with a sigh. 

He leaned back and his back was now resting against Kageyama's bed, Hinata sitting on the floor. After a few moments of silence, Kageyama decided to speak up. 

"Where's your sister?" He asked on a whim. Hinata was silent for a minute. 

"With my dad," he said. "My parents are in a custody battle, I guess."

Kageyama was suddenly concerned, as Hinata sounded and looked so sad and run down when he spoke of this. 

"Are you going to have to move?" Kageyama knew he should stop, that he's being inconsiderate; he was just too curious and _concerned_. 

"If I do, It won't be far," Hinata replied. "I'll still be able to go to Karasuno, if that's what you're wondering."

They were quiet again, Hinata looking as if he was in deep thought. He looked so distracted, that he didn't even react the next time thunder crashed. Kageyama decided to drop the subject for now, only talking about their homework or volleyball. 

Thunder continued to boom and Hinata seemed to get used to it and calm down a little, but he was disturbingly fidgety and quiet. The spiker seemed to radiate anxiety. 

"You good?" Kageyama asked.

Hinata only nodded before picking up his homework and continuing to work. He was writing distractedly before he looked up. 

"Kageyama," he said. "Can I talk to you about something? You don't have to necessarily... _care_ , but I just need you to listen, I guess."

Kageyama nodded and Hinata continued to talk. 

"Is it, uh..." He struggled to find his words. "Is it _normal_ , I guess, for this to happen? I mean, I'm pretty much always alone, I never even know where my mom is or if she'll even come home, and... I just don't know, it feels wrong."

Kageyama just kind of stared at him. I mean, what was he _supposed_ to say, 'sorry your life sucks'?

"I don't," he began hesitantly. "I don't think that's normal."

Damn it, now Hinata was just staring at him, as if he was expecting more. What does he say?

"Your parents should at least tell you where they're going and when they'll be back," Kageyama said. "Especially when it's so late." Hinata sighed next to him. 

"Yeah, I guess," the spiker said. "I always get worried that someone's gonna break in or something. No one else is ever home, so what am I supposed to do?"

Kageyama thought a minute. He felt extremely awkward in this situation and didn't know what to say. This was just unfair. Why would any parent put their kid in a situation like that?

"I don't know," he said. "Have you tried to talk with your mom about it?" Hinata let out a barely audible scoff. 

"I have, she just gets mad. She's not usually mean to me, but she tells me to mind my own business," he said. "It's almost like she's hiding something from me; like there's something big that she doesn't want me to know."

Kageyama took another minute to think, more for Hinata than himself. The boy seemed to be getting worked up, his voice cracking and face turning red. 

"I don't know," he said. "Maybe someone else needs to get involved." Hinata visibly stiffened. 

"No!" he said. "No, no one needs to know. I don't need people feeling sorry for me and I definitely don't need people telling my mom what I'm saying. I don't like it when she gets mad."

"Has she ever tried to hurt you?"

"What? No! She never has and I don't think she ever will, she just yells a lot when she gets mad and she says... mean things."

"Would things be different if you lived with your dad?"  _Stop_ , Kageyama told himself. _You're just making him upset_. 

"I hope so," Hinata replied. "If not, then Natsu's all alone with someone like that."

The two were quiet for a long time, staring at the floor and absorbing what was just said. Kageyama looked over to Hinata and saw his face red and eyes watery. He was crying. 

"Can we just go to sleep?" Hinata asked. "I'm tired."

Kageyama nodded and they turned the lights off, not even bothering to change before turning in. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so yeah, that's that. i'll update this again if i remember but until then, comment and leave kudos if you'd like more.


	3. Unresolved Tension

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a tension between Hinata and Kageyama. The senpais get involved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG  
> i've basically been devoting all my energy to my newest work: Pâro. go check it out, if you'd like.

The days passed and Hinata and Kageyama pretended that nothing happened, though the latter remembers hearing the redhead cry himself to sleep the night he came over. They go through the motions of practice and school, Hinata making a point to avoid any of Kageyama's questions.

Kageyama, however, was beginning to get concerned- especially when Hinata came to practice with dark circles under his eyes as if he hadn't slept a wink. He was even falling asleep during school and was having trouble paying attention during practice. It took three days of this before the setter actually spoke up about it.

"Tired?" That was all he said that day and Hinata nodded, sending him a fleeting, nervous glance. Kageyama decided to try again.

"Have you been sleeping?"

"Nope," came the simple reply. "Not really."

Hinata was so casual about the reply that it took Kageyama a moment to comprehend what he'd even said. When he did, he stopped in his tracks. Hinata looked back at him.

"What?" he asked.

"That's not good," Kageyama replied. "You need to sleep."

Hinata shrugged.

"I'm fine now, aren't I?"

The redhead walked ahead of him and Kageyama took note at the laziness in his step. His feet seemed to drag and he was having trouble keeping up a good pace.

Now, Kageyama Tobio was never one to worry about people. The only thing he was typically concerned with was volleyball, with the exception of his mother whenever she got sick or his father when he had a business trip far away. Other than that, he didn't have much to worry about.

This time, on the other hand, Kageyama was more concerned than he'd ever been about another person. He valued his small spiker, not only as an asset to the team, but as a... friend? Rival? He wasn't sure exactly what their relationship could be called, but it was important for him to preserve nonetheless.

-

Late that night, there was another phone call from Hinata. It may have been around one thirty? Two? It didn't matter. The only thing Kageyama was paying attention to was that the redhead was sobbing into the other line.

"What the hell?" Kageyama said at first. "Uh- I mean... What's wrong? Are you okay? Do you need me to go over there?"

The crying continued, but Kageyama kept talking and asking question after question after question. Strangely enough, the sobbing slowed and the whimpering stopped. Then, he heard Hinata take a deep breath on the other end.

"Thanks," he said nasally.

"What the- I didn't even do anything," Kageyama replied.

"You helped just by answering the phone."

"What even happened?"

Hinata's breathing sped up a bit and he let out a huff.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I just..." A pause. "I've got to go."

Kageyama had no time to respond before Hinata hung up the phone.

-

Kageyama thought about approaching him the next day, but Hinata was once again avoiding him with incredible determination and success. The loudest person Kageyama had ever met also happened to be the most stealthy one. He could make himself disappear in a heartbeat when he wanted to.

Hinata was struggling and everyone knew it. He was good at covering it up, acting happy whenever he was around other people, but when he thought no one was watching, he'd let his smile fade and his eyes screamed for help. Kageyama saw this. He was observant and picked up things about people, but he was so socially awkward that he had no idea what to do.

Their quick was suffering. All this unresolved tension between them caused Hinata to stop trusting him and Kageyama to get too distracted. Everyone on the team could tell that there was something going on between them, the setter sending glances towards the decoy that contained a hint of concern, and Hinata avoiding Kageyama at all times as if he were a nasty virus.

It was after a week that Daichi decided to intervene, mostly because Suga wanted him to. Hinata was basically radiating anxiety and Kageyama seemed angry. Neither Daichi nor Suga had any idea that Hinata was living in a broken household, or that their raven haired setter was doing his best to help, but the spiker wouldn't accept his efforts.

"What's going on between you two?" Daichi asked after keeping the two of them after practice.

Kageyama opened his mouth to reply, about to divulge everything, when Hinata cut him off.

"Nothing, captain," he said. "It's nothing."

Kageyama growled in anger.

"Are you sure you're okay? You've been acting especially... weird lately," Suga said.

"I'm always okay," Hinata replied, flashing a huge smile that seemed to falter at the ends.

After that, he turned around and left quickly, without asking if they were done talking to him. The third years turned to Kageyama.

"What's actually wrong with him?" Sugawara asked.

Kageyama sighed and made them swear to keep it a secret before telling them that Hinata came from a situation that wasn't ideal. That he could barely sleep at night. That he'd called Kageyama that time during what seemed to be an intense panic attack.

Daichi didn't know what to do or say, but Suga said he'd take care of it and try to get the redhead to open up. Kageyama knew that something must've changed since their first phone call. Hinata was acting completely different and Kageyama was worried.

He had no idea how to deal with this. He'd grown up in a structured, sheltered home and the worst thing he'd gone through was the death of his grandfather. His mother, who took pride in her cooking, always made dinner and often insisted on making him breakfast each morning, no matter how early it was, and packing his lunch. His father was supportive and did as much as he could for his family, taking them on trips and vacations whenever he had time off work. His parents were happily married and they never failed in showing him love.

He almost felt guilty, as if he'd been taking everything for granted. Hinata wasn't as lucky as he was, yet Kageyama never thanked his parents enough. Well, rather than wallowing in his guilt, he could act on it. He could and should start paying more attention, being more grateful.

-

Suga and Hinata were late to practice the next day. When they walked in, the latter's eyes were pink and he wore a defeated look on his face. Sugawara's eyes were wide and sad- almost pitying.

The decoy barely made it through practice. He took three balls to the face due to his distractedness and actually ended up leaving early to "go for a walk." When he was gone, Kageyama walked up to his senior.

"What happened?"

Sugawara sighed, conflicted about what to say.

"His situation is... unstable," the third year said. "His parents argue a lot- over the phone, usually. Sometimes they do it in person, but he said that he tries to avoid being around that as much as possible. He said his mom gets pretty mean... verbally, of course. Anyway, he just said that things are kind of a mess right now but he's handling it."

"He forgot to say that his mom's almost never at home," Kageyama pointed out. "He said he has trouble 'keeping track of her.'"

Daichi and Suga gave him a troubled look and a shrug before suggesting that they go to class.


	4. A Backstory

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> we dive into a brief history of Hinata's life and we learn more about his situation.

When Hinata was little, his mother sank into a deep chasm of alcohol and gambling, fueled by her slight mental instability and anger. By the time his sister was born, both parents had substance abuse issues. When Hinata was twelve, his parents divorced and his father moved out, unable to deal with his wife and unwilling to fight for his children.

"Is it my fault?" He'd asked his mother the day his father left them.

"Partially," she'd said with a tight face, not even looking at him. "It's also your sister's, but I guess it's mostly yours."

Hinata never let Natsu find that out. He knew how guilty it made him feel and it was his goal for his sister to have a happy life. He did all the cooking and cleaning, he made sure she had somewhere to go after school, he took care of her whenever she got sick, he was there for her first day of school, and he taught her how to ride a bike. Those good times were all ripped from him just recently when his father took his sister from him, leaving Hinata behind.

His father had cleaned himself up through rehab and won legal custody over his sister after realizing that he'd abandoned his children. Hinata had tried to go with him, but his mother was just a good liar and was good at hiding things. It was Hinata's word against hers and, with her convincing lies in the mix, they believed his mother. Well, he didn't try too hard to prove her wrong. He knew it was useless. His father didn't even want him. The man thought he'd "ruined his chance with his son" and he "needed to start over with Natsu."

Hinata's mother only wanted him around because he took care of the house. She had a job, but blew all her money on her addictions, which caused them to have a shortage of food in the house. Hinata did his best with what he had, but his main priority was to make sure his mother stayed healthy and fed.

He was very high anxiety. Maybe it was because of how many letdowns he'd had in his life. Maybe it was because he was so much smaller than everyone else, making him vulnerable. Maybe it was because of the lack of control he had on his situation at home. Or maybe, it was all these things put together. His parents had failed him. He was short and skinny and was frequently teased for his size. He never knew what his mother would be up to or if she'd be home. His life was a rollercoaster ride at all times, though it went down more frequently than it went up.

Despite how futile his efforts to get away from his mom were, he was punished for his attempts when his mother screamed a string of insults, threats, and profanities at him. She even came close to physically hurting him before she left. That was when he called Kageyama. He didn't want to talk about it, he just didn't want to be alone. He needed someone to talk to him, to make their presence known as he broke down.

When he'd finally calmed down, he was taken over by sudden guilt and embarrassment. Kageyama probably had better things to do than worrying about him. I mean, what if he had his own problems to worry about? Plus, he probably thought that Hinata was weak now; that he was inessential to winning. What if he didn't toss to him anymore? Hinata couldn't risk that.

On top of that, he didn't want Kageyama talking to him about any of this. He didn't want anyone to know how weak he actually was. He didn't want anyone's pity, he didn't want anyone to look down on him. And he most certainly did not want anyone trying to "help" him, for that would simply make things worse.

So, he made his decision. Hinata would avoid Kageyama at all costs. Well, at least until he forgot about everything. The only difficult part was knowing what to do if the setter tried to approach him. He decided to pretend he was busy, to go and talk to other people, to pretend not to hear him. Surely his plan would be foolproof.

-

Days later, when Daichi and Sugawara asked him and Kageyama to stay after, he knew his plan was in trouble. Whenever they'd ask a question, Hinata would respond before Kageyama could get a word in. There. That was his plan. Then, he'd slip away as soon as he saw an opening.

When they talked, his heart rate sped up and he could feel sweat on the back of his neck. He escaped the situation as soon as he could. Maybe too soon. They'd probably get suspicious, but he just needed to leave before he divulged everything.

The next day, Sugawara stopped him before he went into the club room and asked to talk. Shit.

"Is everything alright?" He asked. "At home, I mean."

"Yeah!" Hinata replied with the best smile he could muster. Suga did not look convinced.

"Be honest with me," the third year said. "Please. I just want to help you and I know you're lying."

Suddenly, Hinata's mask fell off. Tears sprang to his eyes as he remembered the insults his mother screamed at him the week prior. They played like a mantra, swirling around in his skull. He was tired that day. His parents were screeching at each other over the phone late into the night hours.

"I'm sorry," he said, rubbing at his eyes. "It's just... family issues."

He hoped that this was enough, but the third year urged him on with a nod and his facade crumbled a little more.

"My parents were arguing last night. They did it over the phone like usual, but it was still loud enough for me to hear." Hinata took a deep breath. "They're separated because my mom is just... mean. I live with her- but she doesn't hit me," he added, seeing Sugawara's concerned eyes. "I try to avoid it as much as possible. Everything's just a complete mess right now but I'll be fine. I can handle it."

Suga nodded and said, "I'm always available whenever you need me."

The two walked in and Hinata was quiet. Disturbingly so. The day didn't start out well and it messed him up for his classes as well. He kept falling asleep and his English teacher threatened to call home, making him try even harder to stay awake. This was going to be a long day.


	5. Late Night Meeting

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is one i had written up for a few days so i thought i'd share it, but i've hit a wall in my creative writing and i barely have any time to do so anymore, so please bear with me.

That day, after practice, Kageyama was determined to corner the decoy. He stood by the doors of the gym and waited for Hinata to try and leave before cutting off his only exit.

"Can you let me through?" Hinata said, frustrated.

"No," Kageyama said. "Not unless you talk to me."

"What am I supposed to say?"

"Something," the setter replied. "Anything. Just... You've gotta let me help you."

"No," Hinata replied. "I don't need help. I'm fine and I'm not weak. I can handle it on my own."

The decoy shoved his way past Kageyama and was walking down the steps, having completely rejected the setter's feeble attempt at helping him.

"Wait," Kageyama said sharply.

"What do you want?" Hinata said, stopping in his tracks.

"I, uh..." Damn it, Kageyama didn't think he'd get this far. "Don't be afraid to talk to me, okay? I won't make fun of you- not about this."

He saw Hinata's shoulders relax a bit, but the decoy still wouldn't turn and face him.

"Thanks, Bakageyama," he said before walking away.

-

It was that night that Hinata called again.

"Hey," he said.

"Hi," said Kageyama. "What's going on?"

"Nothing," he said.

Kageyama heard a bang followed by a loud voice, muffled enough for it to be unintelligible.

"Sorry," Hinata said after a bit of talking. "That was just my mom."

"What'd she say?"

"I need to redo my chores," he responded with a sigh. "All of them."

"Really?" Kageyama asked with raised eyebrows. "It's almost midnight, though."

"I'm used to it," he said. "As long as I have them done by tomorrow morning, I'm fine. I'll just wait until she leaves."

"Where's she going?"

"Not sure," Hinata sounded like he was wracking his brain trying to think. "It's different every night."

Some small talk continued, Kageyama learning even more about Hinata and his situation.

"I've got to go," Hinata said eventually. "I think she's go-"

There was another slam and someone screaming his name and a shuffle that sounded like him putting his phone down. There was more shouting and Hinata was responding, only for things to build up even more.

"You don't even care," he heard Hinata yell, voice muffled. "Why can't I just go and live with Dad?!"

The woman with him started screeching even louder than before and Kageyama could pick out several profanities in what she was saying. Eventually, she left after yelling one last phrase and Kageyama tried to talk.

"Oi," he said. "Hinata?"

"I've got to go," the spiker replied with a sniffle.

"Wait, are you-" Kageyama was cut off by Hinata hanging up the phone.

-

Hinata's eyes were puffy the next morning. He tried to hide it behind a smile, but everyone could tell that it was the result of a late night crying.

"You okay?" Kageyama asked awkwardly, shuffling on his feet.

"Of course," Hinata said, smiling another fake smile that could rip his face in two. "I'm always okay!"

"Stop saying that, dumbass!"

Hinata's smile fell and Kageyama knew he was _finally_ getting somewhere.

"You're not okay," Kageyama said. "I don't care if you want to or not, but you need to talk to someone! Hell, it doesn't even have to be me!"

The spiker's eyes were wide and his mouth was slightly agape. His bottom lip just barely quivered and he closed his eyes, letting out a sigh.

"There's nothing to talk _about_ ," he said, suddenly serious. " _Please_ just leave it alone. I'll say something when I know I need to."

Kageyama opened his mouth to protest, but Hinata had already started walking away, pep back in his step and grin back on his face.

-

The week went by. Kageyama continued to notice just how anxious Hinata would get at times, biting his lip and shaking his legs. Most days, though, Hinata was in a good mood.

It was a Friday when Kageyama got his next call from Hinata. It was a dry thunderstorm, lightning striking and thunder crashing despite the absence of rain. He picked up on the first ring, even though it was the middle of the night.

"Hey," he said. "What do you need?"

Hinata stuttered. "C-can we... meet up somewhere? Like the park across from the school?"

"Sure," Kageyama said, already getting up.

Before he left, Kageyama told his parents where he'd be going and why. He walked quickly and when he got there, he had to wait almost thirty minutes before Hinata showed up, clad in pajama pants and a large hoodie. His hands were stuffed in his pockets and he walked fast, shoulders hunched, jumping at each roll of thunder.

"Hinata," Kageyama said. "What's wrong?"

The redhead looked up and Kageyama saw his pink eyes, tears still streaming down his face. He brought his hands up and rubbed them against his eyes, sniffling.

"She's just..." he trailed off, at a loss of words. "I just hate living with her, you know? She just finds every excuse possible to be m-mad at me." His hands grabbed nervously at his shirt. "She's just... She just keeps yelling at me for _everything_ even when she's the one that makes stupid decisions."

Kageyama didn't know what to say. He just stared at him for a few seconds before finding his voice.

"I-I'm sorry," he said. "I..."

"I just don't know what to do anymore," he said, bursting into tears again.

Kageyama gasped, holding his hands up defensively.

"Hey," he said. "Wait! D-don't cry!" Useless. "Agh- c'mon, dumbass! Calm down!"

Hinata continued to cry and Kageyama grabbed his shoulders, steering him towards a bench and sitting him down. When they were sitting, Kageyama's hands hovered around him, unknowing of what to do to help. He awkwardly put a hand on Hinata's back and rubbed it around in circles- which, surprisingly enough, seemed to calm down.

When Hinata was finally calmed, he sat up and turned to talk to the setter.

"Can I... maybe... go to your house tonight?" Hinata looked at the ground. "I'm sorry, I don't have to if..."

"No," Kageyama said. "It's fine, come on."

The two stood and they began walking.

"What exactly happened?" Kageyama said. "If you don't mind me asking."

"She brought some guy home," Hinata replied. "She told me to do my homework, then yelled at me to do my chores, then told me I was being too loud, then yelled at me for being in the way," his breathing quickened. "Then sh-she called me names and said some really mean stuff, then the guy she brought started laughing and joining in, so I went up to my room and called you."

Kageyama stared at the pavement as they walked. "That's so messed up," he said quietly.

The two continued to walk in silence and Kageyama's parents were waiting when they got to his house. He showed Hinata up to his bedroom and then explained things to his parents, who were happy to have Hinata over once again.


	6. Not-So-Fun Sleepover

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> my poor son

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry that these chapters are so short and sporadic

Kageyama grabbed the futon and set it on the floor.

"You can have my bed if you want," Kageyama offered.

"No," Hinata said quickly. "I'm just fine on the floor."

Hinata was quiet that evening. More quiet than characteristically reasonable. He didn't really say a word unless Kageyama initiated a conversation. It was disheartening, to say the least. It was now around three in the morning, but Hinata's eyes were wide open and he was jittering and fidgeting around.

"You okay?" Kageyama asked.

Hinata gave a curt nod in response.

"Wanna go to sleep? We were gonna practice tomorrow morning."

Hinata sighed before nodding and getting into the futon. A while after Kageyama turned out the lights and got into bed, he saw Hinata reach for his phone. When the light of said phone illuminated the room, the redhead turned the brightness to a minimum.

"Aren't you tired?" Kageyama asked.

"Yeah," Hinata said. "I just can't sleep."

Kageyama gave a grunt in response. His father had insomnia as well and he knew that there wasn't any specific thing you could do to help, that each case was different. Hinata was up pretty much the whole night. Kageyama promised himself he'd stay up with him, that the tiny spiker shouldn't be all alone in the late hours anymore, but he fell asleep at some point, much to his dismay.

With minimal sleep, the two got up and went to practice that morning, Hinata wearing some of Kageyama's old clothes that he didn't know he still had- they were so small, they fit Hinata almost perfectly.

"Hey!" Nishinoya called to the two as they walked up to the community park, which sported a volleyball court and net.

"Hey," Hinata replied with a wave, though his chipper attitude seemed forced.

They began practice and Hinata was having more trouble than usual keeping up his facade. It was so noticeable that Yamaguchi, Tanaka, and Daichi each approached him at different times. Unable to get more than a smile and an, "I'm fine," the captain turned to Kageyama.

"What's _actually_ wrong with him?" Daichi asked, Sugawara at his side.

"Um," Kageyama replied, thinking. "I don't know if... if it's my place to tell you..."

"Kageyama," Suga said. "Please. We really want to help him."

"Well," the raven haired setter mumbled. "He, ah... His mom is... Something happened late last night and we met here and then he just came to my house."

"What happened?" Daichi asked.

Kageyama opened his mouth to respond but Hinata called for him.

"Kageyama!" The spiker said with a tight grin. "Wanna get going? I'm starving!"

The setter said goodbye to his seniors and jogged over to the redhead who was waiting by the entrance of the park.

"Wanna get something to eat?" Kageyama offered. Hinata's smile fell.

"I don't have money."

"I'll pay," Kageyama replied. "Dumbass."

-

It was a long day and Hinata was ignoring several phone calls and texts from his mother- though he knew it wasn't a good idea. He wondered if he should leave, but Kageyama insisted on him staying for the rest of the weekend, and Hinata happily did so.

"Do you have clothes?" Kageyama's mother asked. Hinata frowned.

"N-no," he said.

"That's alright," Kageyama's mother smiled. "I'll just wash what you wore when you came and what you're wearing now. In the meantime, Tobio could find something else for you to wear."

Kageyama nodded and went into his room, emerging with the smallest shirt and pair of pants he had left. When Hinata put them on, he tied the strings of the pants tight and the legs bunched up at the ankles. The shirt went halfway down his thighs and the neckline went down and halfway around his shoulder. Pink dusted his cheeks and he clutched at the hem of the shirt, embarrassed. Kageyama chuckled.

"Hey, Bakayama," Hinata said. "Don't laugh at me!"

"Sorry," Kageyama said as he tried to contain his laughter by putting his hands over his face. "You're just so _stupidly_ small."

Hinata blushed even harder and crossed his arms, biting his bottom lip with a "hmph." Kageyama snickered again before getting the futon ready for the once again. Hinata once again sighed before he reluctantly laid down and Kageyama once again saw him get out his phone. Hinata groaned.

"My mom," he said. "She won't stop texting and calling... She says she's sorry."

"Will you call her back?" Kageyama asked.

Hinata nodded before putting the phone up to his ear.

"Hey, mom... I've been at a friend's house. Yes, his parents said it's fine... No, it's too late to come back now... But- But I... No, I'll come back in the morning... Chores? Seriously? I should've known... I'll be there tomorrow."

Hinata put the phone down and let out the most defeated, exasperated groan Kageyama had ever heard.

"I guess she's not actually sorry," the redhead said bitterly. "I don't know why I was stupid enough to think she actually was."

Hinata curled his knees to his chest and wrapped his arms around them. His eyes watered and his bottom lip quivered. All Kageyama wanted to do in that moment was to reach down and scoop him into his arms, holding him tight and whispering to him that everything would be alright. But he knew he couldn't. It'd be... weird. Kageyama settled for putting his hand on Hinata's head and ruffled his hair. The redhead let him do so, not objecting or pulling away.

-

Kageyama saw Hinata off in mid morning the next day. The redhead left him with a glistening smile, but Kageyama saw that grin falter as he turned to leave.

When the setter walked back into his house, he flopped down on his bed, discouraged. There seemed to be no way to help the other boy and that was all Kageyama wanted. He hated losing. Especially when he seemed to be losing his friend ever so slowly, the redhead closing in more and more. Now that he thinks about it, Hinata's been his only friend since... ever. He wanted to- no, _needed_ to help him. He couldn't let his first friend go through something like this alone.

His determination reignited, he made a vow to make sure he was there for Hinata no matter what.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comment your ideas for an eventual ending because i have absolutely no idea where i'm going with this


	7. Worsening Situation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Kageyama tries to make things better, he makes things worse. So much worse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> true story  
> this happened with me and a friend only a little bit ago  
> everything seems hopeless  
> and there is no end in sight. 
> 
> ** tw for some physical abuse mentioned towards the end

On Monday, it rained all morning long. Kageyama's mother was driving him to the school and the setter texted Hinata to find out if he needed a ride. Getting no response, Kageyama decided to blow up his phone with text messages until he reached the school.

Hinata was not there. In fact, he didn't get there until practice was halfway over, soaked to the bone and shivering violently.

"Hinata!" Sugawara exclaimed. "You walked here in the freezing rain?"

The redhead nodded with a small, sad smile and shivered.

"Dumbass," Kageyama said. "You must be freezing! I texted you and offered you a ride!"

"Sorry. M-my mom took away my ph-phone," Hinata said through chattering teeth.

Yachi immediately came over to him with a towel to dry off his dripping hair and he retreated to the bathroom to change into semi-dry clothes- he came straight to the gym without going into the club room, and his uniform in his gym bag was damp from the rain that soaked through the thin material of the bag. He put his wet clothes out on the club room floor to dry and walked under Yachi's umbrella to and from the gym. By the time he was all situated, practice was basically over.

"I'm sorry," the Hinata said to Daichi.

"It's fine," Daichi replied. "But why didn't your mom drive you?"

Hinata blanched slightly. "She, uh, well..." He looked to his feet and anxiously rocked back and forth on his feet. "She got mad at me, and... Well she just wasn't up to it I guess."

Daichi sighed and gave him a saddened look. "Okay," he said. "Next time it's going to rain, I can pick you up for practice if you want."

Hinata's face lit up. "Really? Thank you!"

-

They went on with the school day and at lunch, Kageyama asked Hinata if he'd be interested in coming over after practice. His expression fell.

"I can't," he said, mouth full of his school-bought lunch. "I'm grounded for a week. No phone, no going anywhere besides school and practice. In fact, I had to beg for her to let me keep going to practice!"

Kageyama saw right through the smile he offered. "It's supposed to storm again tonight," he said. "Will you be alright?"

"I'll be fine," he said. "You worry too much, Bakageyama!"

That day, it began raining again before practice ended. Kageyama's mother insisted on driving Hinata home and he happily took the offer.

"When's the next time you'd like to come over?" Kageyama's mother asked. "We enjoy your company!"

"Well," Hinata began. "I'm not sure. Whenever my mom's alright with it."

When they reached his house, Hinata got out of the car with a wave and a thank you. They watched as he approached the door to the house and took a deep breath before turning the knob and walking in. Kageyama sighed sadly and sat back in his seat.

"What can we do?" He asked. "What can we do to help him?"

"Exactly what is going on?" Kageyama's mother asked.

And so he told her. He told her everything that Hinata had told him. She just drove and nodded in acknowledgment every once in a while, lips in a tight line and face grim.

"You know," she said. "Child abuse is a big problem in our country- verbal, physical, and sexual. I guess I could pull some strings and make some calls about all this."

Kageyama smiled and felt a weight come off his chest. They'd fix this. Hinata would be okay.

-

No.

No, no, _no_.

This can't be happening.

It's been six days since Kageyama's mother made a call to the police about Hinata and he showed up to school late with a bruise on his face. A _bruise_. His lip is split and has purple around it. As if someone hit him.

"I guess you could say I got a little carried away while practicing at home," the redhead said. "Don't worry about it! I'm fine!"

Kageyama hated when he claimed to be "okay" or "fine" because _this is not okay._ He grabbed Hinata's sleeve and yanked him outside the gym doors, their teammates watching in suspicion.

"Hinata," he demanded. "What really happened?"

The boy started and he looked at the ground. "Nothing."

"Bullshit," Kageyama said. "You're going to tell me right now what happened."

"Okay," he said slowly, "but promise me you won't overreact." Kageyama nodded.

"The police came to my house," he began. "They said that someone was concerned that I was being abused. They asked all these questions to me alone but before I left, she gave me this _look_ , Kageyama, it _scared_ me. So I told them that she was the perfect mother." Kageyama sighed and Hinata's demeanor changed as he kept talking.

"They left and she started screaming- like, full on screaming at me." Hinata's eyes watered. "She said I told someone that I was being abused and I tried to tell her that I didn't, I didn't even think any of this counted as abuse because it's not like she's ever hit me before..." He brought his hands up and covered his face.

Kageyama felt his stomach drop lower and lower as he went on. The police going there was his fault. It was his fault that this happened. Hinata continued with a shaky voice.

"She was wearing a ring- I think her stupid boyfriend proposed to her- and it got me right in the lip." He brought his hands down, leaving his red eyes and tear stained cheeks uncovered. Kageyama put his hand on the other's shoulder.

"I'm sorry," he said uncomfortably. "P-please don't cry."

Hinata's face scrunched and a few more tears escaped his eyes as he took a deep breath.

"No," the redhead said. "I'm sorry for freaking out. I just thought about it too much."

Kageyama's chest was tight as he made sure Hinata was calm enough to go back into the gym. When they did so, everyone stopped and stared obnoxiously and Hinata seemed to shrink back a little. Kageyama gave them the most intimidating glare he could muster and they backed off, not bringing it up to Hinata any more.

Kageyama, on the other hand, wasn't as lucky. Daichi and Suga approached him after morning practice was over and they would not take no for an answer.

"I'm not betraying his trust like that," Kageyama said. "I know I told you things before, but he really wants to keep things between us for now."

With that, he retreated as quickly as possible. When lunch came that day, he and Hinata sat at their usual spot around campus, Kageyama drinking his milk and eating his bento, Hinata just glumly pushing his rice around and not taking a bite.

"You need to eat so you can do well at practice," Kageyama said.

"I'm just so nervous and my stomachs all _gwaah_ ," he replied. Kageyama gave him a gentle glare. "Fine," Hinata replied.

Hinata was emotional that day. He'd almost start crying at the drop of a hat and Kageyama was worried. Everyone on their team heard him crying outside the gym doors, but Kageyama would make sure no one asked. If the police weren't doing anything productive about Hinata's situation, what was he supposed to do? And what if Hinata's mother hit him again? _What was Kageyama supposed to do?_

He wasn't sure if he'd be able to figure this one out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks.  
> i don't know when this turned into a bit of a vent piece, but it kind of is.  
> abuse of any kind is by no means okay.  
> if you or someone you know is being abused, i encourage you to contact someone about it that can help.


	8. Admissions and Emotions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> things are getting angsty  
> read the note at the end regarding future updates please!

"She cried," Hinata said on the way to the school the next day.

"What?"

"She felt bad," he explained. "And she cried. After she h-hit me, she hugged me and it was the warmest hug I've felt from her in years. We stayed like that for a long time before she tried to make me dinner- but she burnt it so I had to end up doing it anyways."

Kageyama just stared at him.

"What do I do?"

"Huh?" Kageyama wasn't sure why he was saying all this.

"Should I forgive her?" Hinata asked. "I want to, I really do- she was just mad at me and I know she loves me, and I love her too- so much- and she just got a little carried away is all. But I'm just so _scared_ , Kageyama, I'm scared that it'll happen again."

Hinata's voice was cracking with emotion and it made Kageyama's heart shatter.

"You," Kageyama began. "You don't have to forgive her. Especially not so soon."

"But she feels guilty," the decoy said. "She feels awful and I feel selfish for not trying to make her feel better."

" _You're_ selfish?" Kageyama exclaimed. "She's the one that hurt you!"

"I know, but..." Hinata seemed to be at a loss.

"Listen," the setter said. "You shouldn't feel guilty. I know that you love her and she loves you back, but she shouldn't have done that to you. It's okay to be scared. Just let me know whenever you need help, okay?"

Hinata nodded and they silently continued making their way to practice. When they got there, the decoy had plastered on another smile- which were getting easier and easier to see through with every passing day.

"Hey, Hinata," Nishinoya yelled, running over and slinging an arm around him when he walked in. "You alright? You've been seeming a little down lately."

There was a fleeting look of nervousness on the decoy's face before he answered, smile bigger than ever, "I'm great!"

"Are you sure?" Tanaka asked, walking in on their conversation. "Because if anything's going on at home or something, you can talk to me about it- I've had my fair share of idiot parents!"

Kageyama saw Hinata blanch and he knew that everyone else did as well. He was still saying that he was fine and Kageyama hated it. He was not fine and he needed to admit it.

Practice went on with Hinata more tense than earlier. He was jumpy but quiet at the same time and he wasn't acting like himself at all.

-

When school let out that afternoon and practice let out early, Hinata was quiet and looked queasy on the way home, making Kageyama feel the same by default. He told his parents how their plan to talk to the police backfired and they said they'd have to think more about what to do.

When they were having dinner, his phone rang. It was an unknown number, but it could've been Hinata using his house phone, as he was grounded from his cellphone again. Excusing himself from the table, he picked up to hear hysterical crying on the other end.

"Hinata?" He asked. "Whoa, hey, what's wrong?"

"Sh-she," he started. "She was gonna do it again, I know it!"

Kageyama's stomach plummeted and he made his way into the kitchen for some privacy, ignoring the sad look from his parents as they could probably hear the loud crying.

"What happened?"

"I asked f-for my phone back early," the redhead began. "And then she started yelling at me because she had a b-bad day a-and I guess I was talking back and..." He let out another high pitched sob. "She raised her hand and was about to hit me again! It was in a fist this time and I just..."

There was a knocking sound coming from the other end of the phone.

"Shit!" Hinata said in a whisper. "If she knows I'm talking to you about this she'll get mad. I've got to go."

"Hinata, wait-" Kageyama was cut off by the other hanging up on him.

Hanging his head, he headed back to the dining room.

-

"You're hurt," Kageyama said, pointing to the bruises on Hinata's arms which were barely visible in the dim morning light. They obviously weren't from volleyball.

"No I'm not," the redhead retorted.

"Yes, you are."

"Am not."

"Are too."

"Am _not_ ," Hinata said sternly.

They walked in silence for a while before Kageyama spoke up once again.

"What happened last night?" Hinata stopped walking and sighed.

"Listen," he began. "It's fine. I'm fine. It's none of your business, anyways."

"None of my business?" Kageyama exclaimed. "Like hell it is! I'm the one who's been there for you whenever you call in the middle of the night! I'm trying to help you! Hell, I'm the one who called the damn police!"

Hinata paled and his eyes went wide. Kageyama immediately regretted saying a word.

"You..." he said. "You what?" Hinata looked utterly heartbroken and his eyes watered. "This is... This is _your_ fault," he said, backing away from the setter. "I thought I could trust you." The decoy turned and ran toward the school.

"Hinata," Kageyama called. "Wait!"

-

Kageyama continued to walk at a slower pace behind Hinata. The tiny middle blocker needed time to cool down and the raven haired setter planned on giving that to him.

When he did reach the school, though, Hinata wasn't there. And neither was Sugawara. The captain walked up to Kageyama angrily.

"Outside," Daichi demanded. "Now."

"Well," the captain said when they were outside of the gym. "What'd you do?"

"What?"

"You heard me," Daichi said, louder now. "Hinata came in crying hysterically and all he could get out was your name. So what did you do?"

"I, uh," Kageyama stuttered. His heart was racing and there was an anxious, guilty lump in his throat. "I didn't mean for it to happen... I was just... I was trying to help."

"What?"

The captains voice softened at the raw emotion in Kageyama's own voice. And Kageyama told him. He spilled every piece of information to the third year and tried not to cry while doing it. This hurt. God, it hurt _so much_ to feel so helpless and have to watch your best friend being broken right in front of you.

"I'm sorry," Daichi said, putting a firm hand on the setter's shoulder. "I'm sorry I got so mad before knowing the whole story."

The two walked in, Kageyama hanging his head and Daichi with a saddened look on his face. Everyone knew something was wrong. Very wrong. Despite that, no one asked.

Hinata and Sugawara walked in later, the latter with his hand on the former, whose face was puffy and tear stained. They continued practice, but Hinata wouldn't talk to the black haired setter at all. In fact, the redhead refused to spike any of Kageyama's tosses that whole practice. It broke his heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKAY  
> so exams are coming up so i'll have to do A LOT of studying here.  
> and i have lots of makeup work from missing school for counseling appointments (etc)  
> and i have practice and games every day  
> SO, that being said, updating this stuff is H A R D. updates will be sporadic and i'll try to write as much as i can.  
> thanks for reading!


	9. A Conflict Solved

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> let's just say that tension continues and it leads to some screaming.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's baaaack! sorry it took so long, but i have another week until exams are over so you can expect an update around then.

"Hinata," Kageyama said, trying to catch him in the hall. "Talk to me, please."

He didn't budge.

"Listen," Kageyama said. "I-I'm... I'm sorry."

"Get away from me," was all he said before brushing past him and walking faster, weaving in between other people to dodge any further conversation.

Kageyama watched him leave and his eyes drifted down to the decoy's arms. The bruises were more visible in the lighting of the school and he realized just how dark they were. Some were oblong and patterned as if a hand were grabbing his arm. Others were bigger and positioned as if he were shielding himself from several blows.

Several.

It wasn't just one hit this time, it was _several_.

-

When practice came that afternoon, the redhead still avoided Kageyama at all costs. He was completely silent the whole day and it, in turn, dampened everyone's mood.

"Hey, Hinata," Nishinoya said. "Is my kouhai okay?"

Hinata's lips curved slightly as if he were about to fake another smile, but he ended up not even trying. His mood was too sour and his day was too awful to give more than a halfhearted nod before slumping and walking away, leaving Noya with a sad, slightly distraught expression.

When practice ended, they got word to get home quickly to avoid getting caught in a storm.

"Hinata," Kageyama tried again. "Call me if you need, okay?"

He could've sworn he'd seen the redhead roll his eyes before turning to walk away.

Kageyama let Hinata walk home alone and set out at his own pace a few minutes after him. If the idiot didn't want to talk to him, then so be it. It _totally_ didn't make him upset. Or angry. Or lonely.

Okay, well, maybe it did. But he'd be fine on his own. Both of them would be.

-

Hinata didn't call that night. He didn't text, he didn't call, and Kageyama was worried. Was he seriously so angry that he'd sit through a bad storm all alone at night? Apparently, because Hinata managed to avoid him completely all day long, Kageyama only seeing him across the classroom.

When Kageyama got to his usual spot where he ate his lunch, Hinata was already there. He was standing with Sugawara- who seemed to be Kageyama's replacement at this point. The thing is, there was something off about the redhead that day. He was pale but his cheeks were flushed and he looked more tired than usual.

"You should go to the nurse," Suga was saying. Hinata smiled.

"No," he said, voice nasally. "I'm fine, re-" Then his voice cracked and he went into a violent coughing fit, the third year rubbing his back and slowly leading him towards the nurse's office.

"Whoa," he heard Suga say as they walked. "You're burning up!"

Kageyama followed them. He wasn't being weird in any way, he was just worried. It's not like he was stalking him or anything.

When he reached the nurse a little after they did, he heard talking.

"You need to go home," the nurse was saying, " but you're not eighteen so you need to leave with a parent. I'll call your mother and she can come get you."

The nurse's footsteps faded as she left the room and Hinata started mumbling.

"She's not going to care," he said. "She knew I had a fever but she wouldn't let me stay home."

Sure enough, the nurse came back in with a sour tone in her voice.

"She said she's unavailable," the woman said. "But she sends her love. Now, should I phone your father then?"

There was a silence and Kageyama soon heard the nurse leave and before she came back, the bell rang. Kageyama reluctantly made his way to class. But before he did, he heard Hinata say one last thing to Suga.

"He won't come, either."

-

Sure enough, Hinata came to practice that afternoon after sitting in the nurse's office all day long.

"Why aren't you at home?" Daichi asked when he walked in. Hinata looked to the ground.

"Don't want to," he said.

"But you're sick," the captain said. "You need to rest, you should really-"

"Please don't make me go," Hinata begged. "Please, I don't... I don't want to."

He started coughing again as he seemed like he was about to cry, but was able to contain it quickly.

"Wh- Okay," Daichi said as Suga elbowed him in the ribs. "Alright. Just sit on the bench, or lay down. There's no way you're participating today."

Hinata's shoulders relaxed and he let out a sigh, mouthing a quick 'thank you' before making his way towards the bench.

Kageyama realized that he was staring. Everyone else was stretching and warming up, but the setter was just standing there and watching them intently. Focusing his attention on volleyball, he began to practice. Alone.

-

"Hinata," Kageyama tried once more when everyone was cleaning up after practice. "Come on, how many times do I have to apologize?"

"Let's see," Hinata replied loudly and bitterly, wheeling around on him with a raspy voice. "How many times will it take to undo what you caused?"

Kageyama was shocked. He stood there and stared at him, not knowing what to say. Everyone that was helping pick up was now staring at them.

"You," Hinata said a little quieter now. "You told the damn police. You told your parents. There's not a doubt in my mind that you told Suga and Daichi everything, too. What, do you want to tell all of them now, as well?" His voice kept rising, but it seemed like he was trying to keep it from doing so.

"I'm sorry," Kageyama said loudly and defensively. "I didn't know any of this would ha-"

"Well it did," the middle blocker interjected. "And now everything's more of a mess than it already was."

"I was just trying to help-" Kageyama began, only for the decoy to interrupt him yet again.

"Well you didn't," Hinata yelled. "You just fucked everything u-"

"Listen to me!" Kageyama bellowed.

If the place wasn't already silent, it certainly was now. Angry tears streamed down Hinata's face and threatened to escape Kageyama's eyes, as well. The setter took a deep breath and was about to talk when the captains ushered them outside to escape the curious glances of their teammates.

"You guys have got to sort this out," Daichi said.

After a few minutes of silence in which both first years calmed down, Kageyama tried again.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't know this would happen and I thought I would be helping, but I guess I just fucked things up even more. If I could undo everything, I would, but since I can't, can you just forgive me already?"

Hinata was silent before answering in a soft, broken voice.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I'm just so angry, I'm just... Everything's just so messed up right now and it just feels so hopeless."

The decoy's voice was cracking and he drew in another wheezy breath as he tried to calm down. His attempts were unsuccessful and he just started crying again. Suga was rubbing his back and Daichi spoke once more.

"Why don't you walk him home," he said.

The two set off towards the mountains once Hinata got a hold of himself. They walked in silence, save for the occasional cough or sniffle from the redhead. They were running later than usual and he heard a whispered "shit" from Hinata once he realized the time. Kageyama sent him various nervous glances and refused to leave him alone until he got all the way home.

"Here it is," Hinata said once they reached his house. "You can go now."

Suddenly, the door of the house opened.

"Shouyou!" Came a yell from inside.

At the door stood a woman with brown hair hanging to her shoulders. She had a narrow frame and wore baggy clothing, cigarette in one hand and another hand leaning on the doorframe.

"Where've you been?" The woman questioned. "I thought that if you were sick enough to whine about it at school, you'd be skipping practice too. Well, I guess that means you're well enough to go tomorrow, as well."

"Sorry," Hinata said, more to Kageyama than to his mother.

The redhead muttered a quick goodbye before turning and walking towards the house, hands in his pockets and shoulders tense. An anxious lump formed in Kageyama's throat and he waited for the door to be slammed shut behind Hinata before turning to leave. It had been an emotionally grueling day and he only felt worse and worse as he walked home.


	10. Just A Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> poor hinata has trouble sleeping and when he finally does, what greets him is unpleasant.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> here's a short update for you  
> ☆〜（ゝ。∂）

The days passed and Kageyama was filled with excitement. It was a Friday and they had a training camp that weekend. Kageyama was relieved- Hinata wouldn't have to go back home until Monday afternoon.

Things were still a little awkward between him and Hinata, but at least the middle blocker would spike his tosses now. They'd also gone back to their usual competitions, but they'd sometimes find themselves in tense silence, as if they were both thinking back to Hinata's situation.

Though he was usually loud and impulsive, Tanaka had his suspicions. He knew something was wrong with Hinata and all the signs pointed to it being at home with his parents. He also knew that Kageyama knew more about it than anyone else, and his suspicions were confirmed when the two got themselves into a screaming match after practice.

"You guys ready for the weekend?" Tanaka yelled as he threw his arms over the first years' shoulders, the two immediately stiffening in surprise and Hinata let out a small, surprised yelp.

"Of course!" The redhead yelled as he whipped around, bright smile on his face and fists clenched like he was ready for anything.

The boys all piled on the bus after school and Hinata seemed to be back to his old self. He sat next to Kageyama on the bus and he was jittering and shaking with excitement where he sat. It had been a while since any of the boys had seen him this genuinely happy about anything and it immediately put them all in a good mood.

"Kageyama," he said. "Who all is going to be there? What do you think the food there will be like? Is the weather supposed to stay nice? I sure hope so. It'd suck to have to run in the rain."

He rambled on and on and Kageyama went off on him, like usual, except when Kageyama began yelling, Hinata jumped out of his skin and his arms jerked upward as if he was about to shield himself, but then thought better of it and brought them back down.

After that, the silence between them was deafening. Hinata looked at the ground and Kageyama stared at him, wide eyed and horrified.

"I'm..." Hinata said. "I'm sorry, I don't know why I-"

"Did you really think I was going to hurt you?" The setter asked.

Now, Kageyama knew he wasn't good with people. When he and Hinata would argue, it would be filled with playful punches so Hinata would flinch back sometimes, but it was never out of fear like it was now. Seeing the fleeting flash of terror in Hinata's eyes as soon as he started yelling was like being stabbed through the heart.

"What?" Hinata exclaimed. "I- What? No! No, no, no. Of _course_ not!"

They sat the rest of the way in silence and when they got there, it was so late that the boys all went straight to bed.

-

The raven haired setter woke up in the middle of that first night. He got up, used the restroom, and went back to bed. At the same time, he looked over at Hinata on the futon next to him. The decoy had insisted on sleeping in between Kageyama and Sugawara and they weren't really sure why, but now Kageyama knew.

Hinata's breathing was quick and each breath ended in a quiet sob. His hands were clenched in his pillow and his face, which Kageyama could barely make out in the dim light, was scrunched in what seemed to be a mixture of terror and pain as tears ran down his cheeks. But he was asleep.

"Hinata," Kageyama whispered. "Baka, hey."

The setter poked him in the cheek and he began to shuffle as if he was waking up. When he actually did awake, he shot upward into a sitting position, hands grasping his chest and breath coming in squeaks. It was almost loud enough to wake up the senpais next to them.

"Whoa," Kageyama said as Hinata continued to gasp and cry. "Hey, you okay?"

Hinata continued to cry and his breathing was so strained, it seemed like it hurt. Kageyama didn't know what to do and it looked like it was getting worse.

Reaching around Hinata, Kageyama shook awake Suga. The silver haired setter groggily opened his eyes, but was immediately snapped into attention when he heard Hinata sobbing.

"What happened?" Suga asked urgently.

"I don't know," Kageyama replied. "He was having a nightmare and when I woke him up, this happened!"

Quietly making his way to Hinata, the third year helped the spiker stand, ignoring his pronounced flinch at his touch. Kageyama followed them out the door and into the hallway outside their dorm.

"Hinata," Suga said. "You're okay, it was just a dream."

Instead of calming down, Hinata buried his face in his hands and let his gasping and sobbing get louder. The three of them just stood there for a minute and Hinata ended up swaying as if he was going to fall over, catching himself on the wall and making his way into a crouched sitting position. Suga sat on his left and Kageyama sat to his right.

"You're safe," Suga said. "You're okay, there's nothing to worry about."

Hinata let out a final huffing breath before his sobs were reduced to sniffles and light whimpers. He stood and walked across the hallway to the water fountain and took a long, greedy drink. Suga and Kageyama stood with him.

"Are you alright?" Suga asked.

Hinata nodded, staring at the ground.

"I'm s-sorry," he said. "That happens s-sometimes."

"Does it happen when you're alone?" Kageyama asked.

Hinata nodded and his lip was quivering again. Shit, Kageyama _knew_ he shouldn't have asked anything. He finally speaks up and the decoy almost starts crying again.

"Is it alright if I hug you?" Suga asked.

Hinata vigorously nodded and quickly buried his face in the third year's shirt, wrapping him in an embrace so sincere and tight, it didn't look like Suga would ever be set free again.

"I'm just gonna go," Kageyama said.

He obviously wasn't of any help and he thought he'd just make things worse. Kageyama wasn't sure when or how he got to sleep that night, but he did.


	11. Of Training Camps And Nosebleeds

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata gets hit in the face, again, and gets a bit more hurt than usual...  
> but he does not need anyone to call his mother, he makes that perfectly clear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyooo i'm back again and i'm about to drop another chapter for you

When Kageyama awoke the next morning, Hinata was back in his futon, blanket pulled all the way up to his face, just revealing his swollen eyes.

Rather than waking him up early, the boys decided to let him sleep a little longer. Suga woke up and said that they were up late into the night hours, so they let him sleep more, too.

When the time came to wake the two up, Suga was awake almost right away- apparently, with enough sleep, he's quite the morning person. Hinata, on the other hand, put his head under his pillow and held it there.

"Oi, dumbass," Kageyama said, crouching down next to him as everyone else got ready. "Time to get up."

"Nnnhh," Hinata groaned, snuggling deeper into his blanket.

"Come on," Kageyama grunted, poking him over and over. "Get up."

Hinata continued to groan and Kageyama, completely fed up, ripped the blanket away from him- or attempted to, as the spiker's had a surprisingly strong grip on said blanket. Finally getting him to let go, Kageyama pulled the spiker out of bed.

After Hinata took a shower and got dressed, though, he was surprisingly energetic, marveling at how incredibly comfortable the futon was the night before- which was strange, since everyone else woke up stiff.

"You ready to win all of our practice matches today, Kageyama?" Hinata asked as he took off towards the gym.

"Yeah," Kageyama said. "But we're eating first. Come on."

"Huh?" Hinata exclaimed. "But it's so early, I'm not even hungry yet!"

"Don't you eat breakfast on normal mornings?"

"No," Hinata replied confidently. Kageyama sighed at how the decoy never took care of himself.

"Well today you do."

When eating, Hinata practically inhaled his food. Kageyama didn't know how someone so small had enough room for that much food.

When it was time for them to warm up for practice, Hinata and Kageyama raced like usual. Kageyama noticed how Hinata could act so normal after what happened the night before. You'd almost never realize how much he was struggling. Almost.

By their free time after lunch, though, Hinata had hit a wall. He insisted on going back to the dorm and climbing in his futon and going to sleep, only to be woken up within an hour to get back to training.

That first day was both the best and the worst. They were all getting into the routine of being up and active, playing volleyball all day long. Hinata, especially, seemed to be having trouble what with his lack of sleep and all. He was so distracted, in fact, that he managed to get a nosebleed by taking one too many balls to the face.

"Are you feeling alright?" Takeda asked. "Dizzy at all? Nauseous? Should I call your parents?"

"No!" Hinata yelled, shooting up from where he sat.

Kageyama, who had been staring at him to begin with, realized that everyone had joined him. Takeda was staring at him in slight shock, as Hinata seemed more panicked than usual.

"Uh," Hinata began again, staring at the floor. "I'm fine, thank you. I was just tired."

"You've gotta wake up and pay attention," Ukai said to the redhead.

"I'm sorry," Hinata exclaimed, bowing and dripping more blood on the floor. "I just didn't get much sleep last night!"

"Try to get to bed earlier tonight then," Ukai responded.

Hinata was out for the rest of the game, pouting as he watched everyone else play. He was glum then and still was when they went for dinner.

"Hey, dumbass," Kageyama said. "You okay?"

All he got in response was a nod as the decoy continued picking at his food.

"What's wrong?"

"They almost called my mom," Hinata said with a sigh. "I already feel awful and if I get hit with another ball then I'll probably just feel worse and they'll call her." He put his head in his hands. "I don't want to have to go home. Especially over something so stupid. She'll make fun of me."

"Just ask to sit out for a bit," Kageyama suggested. Hinata sighed.

"I guess I could," he said. "As long as they don't try to tell her I got hurt."

When asking to sit out, Hinata was sure to mention that he was okay and _he did not need anyone to call his mom_. The teacher and coach looked curious, but they didn't pry. Great. Now Hinata was raising red flags and would surely have to answer more questions at some point. Who knows? They might even call the police on his mother like Kageyama had.

As the day went on, Kageyama found himself distracted by Hinata's absence from the court. His sets were off and his serves were just as bad. The remainder of the day went by painfully slow and he was relieved when they got to go to sleep that night.

The next day was better, though. Hinata was feeling better and Kageyama was glad to have him back on the court. He didn't have any nightmares that night, which was also a plus, though he didn't sleep well, anyways.

On the second to last day, Sunday, they had a large barbecue. Everyone was laughing and talking and it was by far the best part of the trip. Strangely, Kageyama got the majority of his happiness from seeing Hinata enjoying himself. His stomach did a flip seeing him throw his head back in laughter. The shorter teen's smile made his heart beat faster.

That aside, he felt Hinata's anxiety grow as they got on the bus to leave. He fidgeted around more and bounced his leg for the whole trip.

"It's Monday," he said on the way back.

"What?" Kageyama replied. "Er, yes, it is. Why?"

"Her stupid boyfriend is over."

Kageyama felt a twinge of pain in his chest knowing that Hinata would have to go back to that place.

"I'm sorry," Kageyama whispered to the boy that was sullenly staring at the ground. "Is there any way you could just avoid them?"

Hinata shrugged. "I could try."

What would Kageyama be able to do to change things? He couldn't call the police... Maybe just have him over more often? Things seemed hopeless yet again.


	12. You Can Talk To Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> things are getting better...?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so i think i told someone that the next chapter would be up like next week but i'm a liar so¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

Kageyama lay in bed that night, thoughts plaguing his mind.

What was Hinata doing right now? Was he asleep? Was he crying, all alone with no one to comfort him? Was he thrashing around in bed with another nightmare? Was he gasping for air, panicking and hyperventilating? Was he being hurt by his awful mother and her just as awful boyfriend?

He rolled over in bed onto his stomach and buried his face in his pillow. Staying awake and thinking about it all night long wouldn't do anything to help. If he was really that worried, he could always call the dumbass, right?

But something about that made him nervous. He didn't know why, but he couldn't bring himself to just _pick up the damn phone and call him you idiot._

With minimal sleep, he got up the next morning and dressed, like usual. His mother made him breakfast, like usual. His father kissed his mother on the cheek before going to work, like usual. And Kageyama walked out the door and began walking to his meeting place with Hinata, like usual.

When he got there, Hinata was already standing there, waiting for him. He turned and offered a glimmering smile.

"Hey, Kags," he said. "Ready to lose today?"

Kageyama did, in fact, lose- he likes to think it was because of the lack of sleep, but then again, Hinata almost never sleeps so it only made them even.

"That's 87-87," Hinata said. "I'm finally caught up to you!"

Kageyama couldn't help but smile at his enthusiasm, turning his head to avert Hinata's gaze. Suddenly, Hinata gasped.

"You're smiling," he exclaimed. "And it's- it's actually _not_ creepy!"

The shorter teen ran around Kageyama to face him and try to see his smile, but Kageyama covered his face, smiling even bigger now.

"Stop, dumbass!" Kageyama was blushing now. "You're so annoying," he said with a laugh.

Hinata finally stopped running around him and trying to pry his hands away from his face.

"You should laugh and smile more," he said. "It really suits you."

"You're such a dork," Kageyama replied.

Face still hot, Kageyama continued to walk into the gym with him.

-

That Friday, Kageyama would be having Hinata over again. Hinata's mother was reluctant to let him go, as she was concerned about him missing his chores, but he promised to do double the chores for a week after he came back- which seemed to be a bit extreme to Kageyama- so she let him go.

When the two got there, Kageyama was under the impression that Hinata's situation had gotten a bit better- or, at least, it hadn't gotten any worse. Hinata was acting more normal, kind of like how he'd been at the very beginning of the year, before things began getting bad. Kageyama was happy to see Hinata in a better mood and assumed that things were okay now.

Kageyama was wrong.

When they reached the Kageyama household, he showed Hinata up to his bedroom to put his stuff down before dinner. When Hinata bent down to place his bag down, his shirt came up by his hip, just a little bit, and Kageyama could see some bruising on his back.

"What happened?" He asked. "To your, uh... To your back."

Hinata scrambled to pull down his shirt even farther.

"Nothing," he said.

That's just it- he didn't even offer some stupid excuse he made up. And he looked at Kageyama with these eyes... Like he was _desperate_. It was almost as if he _wanted_ Kageyama to find out.

"It didn't look like nothing," Kageyama pried. "Just let me see."

He stepped forward and reached for the hem of Hinata's shirt, the shorter teen not even struggling against him. When he got his shirt off, he could see a mesh of purple bruising on his back. It was worse at the top, near his shoulders. The skin was red and irritated, like if it took just one more blow it would burst open.

"What happened," Kageyama demanded.

Hinata just burst into tears. His face scrunched up painfully and his facade broke, loud sobs ringing through the room. He turned and grasped Kageyama's shirt and the latter pulled Hinata close and held him there as he cried. And cried. And _cried_.

Damn. Kageyama was wrong all this time. It hadn't gotten better and these bruises looked recent, as if they'd happened within the last day or so. And judging by the way that Hinata was reacting, the emotional trauma was still raw as well.

"Belt," Hinata managed. "It was a belt."

His wounds weren't like Kageyama would imagine. He thought the skin would be broken and scabbed over, messy and bloody. His back was bruised and swollen and it just looked so _painful_ and it looked like it would just start bleeding if he moved the wrong way.

"Okay," Kageyama said, hoping his mother wouldn't come in at the sound of him crying.

She did.

"Tobio," she said, opening the door slightly. "Hinata? Is everything okay?"

"Yes!" Hinata yelled, running forward and using one hand to slam the door shut. "Uh, we're fine! Thanks!"

With an "okay," Kageyama's mother went back down the stairs.

"Come on, dumbass," Kageyama said. "We need to get some ice for your back. My mom's gonna find out sooner or later."

Hinata gulped.

"I just don't want to cause trouble," the redhead said, voice cracking. "I just want to come here and have fun and be happy. I don't want this to be ruined too."

"I'll go get ice," Kageyama began. "And then you need to tell me what happened."

When Kageyama reached the bottom of the stairs, his parents were bombarding him with questions. Kageyama explained that _no_ , Hinata wasn't okay, and _yes_ , he was hurt, and he was getting ice and they'd be late to dinner.

"So what happened," Kageyama asked. Hinata was laying face down on his bed and Kageyama was applying the ice to his back. "You can tell me, you know."

"Well," Hinata said, voice nasally and face in a wince from the pressure on his back. "It wasn't her this time. I-It was her idiot boyfriend." He paused. "He's moving in."

Kageyama could hear the hurt and despair in his voice.

"C-can we just talk about this later, or something?" Hinata asked.

"Sure," Kageyama replied. "Let's just go to dinner."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i swear i am literally kageyama


	13. Just Try It

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have an ending in mind.   
> so sorry, this chapter is almost two hundred words shorter than the rest, but i promise i'll update again soon.   
> go check out my work Pâro because i'll be ending that within the next week or so probably. thanks!

Somehow, Hinata managed to avoid the conversation of what happened all weekend. With determination, Kageyama approached him on Monday after seeing him off in the afternoon on Sunday.

"You," Kageyama began, pulling up a chair and sitting in front of his desk in their first period class. "You are going to tell me what happened."

Hinata immediately blanched. "I don't want to."

"Come on," Kageyama pried, though he knew he shouldn't. "You can talk to me."

"Well, uh," Hinata began. "Like I said, it was her b-boyfriend this time. I told her that I didn't like him- I'd been planning on telling her for a while but I was too scared and I finally got myself to do it."

He stopped for a second and Kageyama ushered him on.

"She smacked me," he said. "And I-I started running up to my room and he- _he followed me up there,_ Kageyama, I was so scared, and he told me to t-take my shirt off and I..."

Hinata stopped and took a deep breath. "I, um... I told him no. But then he grabbed my arm," he pointed to faint, oblong bruises on his forearm. "And he punched me in the stomach and then I did, I took it off, and he told me to kneel down, but I wasn't going to do that either, and-"

"Whoa," Kageyama said. "Wait a sec. Take a deep breath, you're turning purple."

Hinata leaned forward on his desk and put his face in his hands. He stayed there and just breathed for a minute before continuing.

"He pushed me. He pushed me down and I fell on the ground and he took his freaking belt off and hit me with it. Over and over and over again."

Kageyama didn't know what to do. Luckily, no one was bothering them or asking why Hinata was so upset, but he knew they'd draw attention if he started crying- and there it was. Tears coming from his eyes. He was crying now and _shit_ , Kageyama had no idea what to do.

"What did your mom do?" Kageyama asked.

"Nothing," Hinata replied. "She just stayed downstairs and didn't do anything about it. She probably heard me crying but she didn't do anything."

"Does your dad know this happens?"

Hinata froze at that and averted his eyes.

"Does he?" Kageyama pried.

"Kageyama," Hinata began. "He doesn't want me. They fought with each other over my sister, but he didn't want me. Neither of them did, really. There's nothing I can do to change that."

Then, the bell rang and class started, Hinata looking to the front of the room with tears in his eyes and a faraway look.

-

That afternoon, it stormed. Again.

There was something that Kageyama's mother would always say to him when he was little. When he had trouble making friends at school, or when he had that falling out with his middle school volleyball team.

"The storm will pass," she'd say. "It can't be like this forever."

The storm would pass. _Hinata's_ storm would pass. Maybe not soon, but eventually. He won't be living with his mother forever, he'd eventually go off to university. Or maybe he'd go to live with his dad. Or maybe his mother would see the error in her ways?

Kageyama wasn't sure. Maybe this storm _wouldn't_ pass.

-

Kageyama was running late to afternoon practice that day. He rushed to his meeting spot with Hinata where they'd normally race to the school, but he wasn't there. Instead, he was already at the gym.

"Looks like I win by default," Hinata said, sticking his tongue out. He gasped. "Do you know what that means? I'm ahead of you now!"

Kageyama growled.

"This one doesn't count, dumbass," he shouted, reaching for his head.

Hinata quickly dodged him, but fell in the process, landing flat on his back with a cry and a thud. His face scrunched up in pain and he covered his mouth for a second as he sat up.

"Hey," Suga said. "You alright?"

"Mmm hmm," Hinata replied, mouth still pressed in a tight line and eyes still wide.

Kageyama held out his hand and helped him up.

"S-soff... sorry," Kageyama struggled.

Hinata smiled. "You're fine. It's not your fault."

Suga insisted that Hinata take things easy that day, which he surprisingly did without protest. Not so surprising, however, was that Kageyama could see a small spot of blood on the back of his shirt. His skin had split open and began to bleed.

When they were walking home- Kageyama insisted on walking him- they were quiet. The rain had stopped and the thunder had quieted, though it would still become loud at times.

"You know," Hinata began. "Everything was fine back when she would just go to her boyfriend's house. Everything just started going downhill when she started inviting him over."

Kageyama was silent.

"I hate him," the redhead continued. "I hate him and I hate that he's there and he's just so _mean_ and so is she whenever he's around."

"Hinata," Kageyama said, stopping. "Call your dad. Call him and tell him what's going-"

"No," Hinata said. "No, I don't- it's not-"

"Just try," Kageyama said. "It can't hurt, can it?"

"Yes, Kageyama, it can. What if he tells my mom I told him?"

"Why would he do that, though?" Kageyama asked. "If you tell him that you're just not safe there, I'm pretty sure he'd come and get you."

Hinata sighed. "I'll think about it."

When they approached Hinata's house, Kageyama didn't leave. He walked with him to the front door and watched as Hinata turned to him expectantly.

"Are you going to leave?" He asked. "I don't think you really want to stay."

"Do you want me to leave?"

Hinata stared at him a moment and Kageyama began to turn around before a small hand latched onto his arm.

"No," he said. "No. Please stay."


	14. Making The Call

The two teens walked into the house and Hinata's mother and her boyfriend were on the couch, too enthralled in each other to notice them come in. As soon as Kageyama entered the house, he was hit with the smell of cigarettes and booze.

"I'm home," Hinata said. There was no response but his mother waving him off, continuing to kiss her boyfriend. Hinata sighed. "I have a friend with me."

At that, they broke the kiss and both looked up at them.

"Shouyou," his mother said, reaching for a pack of cigarettes. "Why on earth do you have a friend over? It's almost nine o'clock."

"I-I was just..." Hinata trailed off.

"Tell your friend to leave and go upstairs," his mother demanded. Her voice wasn't very stern, but it definitely didn't have an affectionate tone.

"Okay," Hinata said, looking at the ground in disappointment.

He grabbed Kageyama's arm and walked back out the front door, closing it behind them.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I don't know what I was thinking, I just... I don't want to be alo-ne."

His voice cracked horribly at the last word and he broke down quietly into tears. Hinata covered his face with both his hands and allowed his breath to come in squeaking gasps, still quiet enough to not be heard by those inside.

"Hey," Kageyama said. "Hey, come here."

Kageyama gave into the urge to wrap the smaller teen up in his arms and did so, hugging him tightly to his chest. Hinata wrapped his slender arms around Kageyama as well and gripped the back of his shirt as if he'd disappear in a second.

"Don't leave me," Hinata cried. "Don't leave me alone here."

"Look at me," Kageyama said, grabbing Hinata's shoulders and forcing him to look up at him. "Go up to your room and call me. I'll talk to you the whole time I'm walking home and during the night if I have to, alright?"

Sniffling again and wiping his face with the back of his hands, Hinata nodded and whispered a quiet "bye" before going back into the house.

Kageyama slowly began making the trek home, staring at the phone in his hand and waiting. And waiting. And _waiting_. Why was he taking so long? When Kageyama was already halfway home, Hinata finally called him, the name "dumbass" popping up on the screen. Kageyama picked up on the first ring.

"Hey, dumbass," Kageyama said. "What took you so long?"

"K-Kageyama," Hinata said with another sob. "I don't wanna be here."

"You didn't answer my question," Kageyama said. "What took you so long?"

"She saw I was c-crying again and sh-she started yelling at me and said I was being a whiny b-bitch."

Suddenly, Kageyama felt a burning rage in the pit of his stomach. He wanted to turn around and go back to Hinata's house and hurt his sorry excuse for a mother. He wanted to hurt her stupid ass boyfriend in the same way he hurt Hinata.

"Kageyama?" Hinata said. "Are you still there?"

"Yeah," the setter replied, realizing that he'd been silent for a while. "Sorry, I was, uh... thinking."

"Wow," Hinata said. "You don't do that often."

Kageyama stifled a chuckle, glad that the redhead finally stopped crying because he had _no idea_ how to deal with a crying Hinata. They spoke for a long time, Kageyama getting his dinner and bringing it up to his room since his parents already ate. He could hear dishes clanging on the other end and assumed that Hinata was doing chores- _when does this guy eat dinner?_ Kageyama assumed he didn't, as he heard him doing chores, and then they did homework, and then they each got situated in bed and they had probably been talking for almost three hours.

"Kageyama," Hinata said. "I think I might try to talk to my dad... tomorrow."

"That's good," the setter replied. "Good, that's good."

"Will you be with me when I do it?"

Kageyama started. He really didn't want to intrude on Hinata's over-the-phone reunion with his father, but he assumed that he could provide some moral support.

"Sure," he replied.

"Good," Hinata replied. "I'm... glad."

There was a long moment of silence and Kageyama spoke up again, only to find that Hinata was asleep, breathing heavily. He then hung up and went to bed, himself.

-

When Kageyama woke up, there was a text from Hinata to try to get to the school early. He did get there about twenty minutes early and saw that Hinata was already there, as well, phone in hand.

"Are you ready, Kageyama?" Hinata asked.

"Sure," Kageyama replied. "Are you?"

Hinata was visibly trembling and he looked a bit paler than usual. He nodded.

"Yeah."

He brought the phone up and sat on the stairs leading to the gym. He tapped the contact labeled "Dad" and brought the phone to his ear. As soon as Kageyama heard a "hello" on the other end, Hinata stood up and began pacing.

"Hey, Dad," Hinata said. "I have a question- but you have to promise me you won't tell Mom." There was something said on the other line that Kageyama didn't quite catch.

"Speaker," Kageyama whispered. Hinata put the phone on speaker.

"Okay," the redhead said. "Um... Can I come and live with you and Natsu?"

There was a sigh on the other end. "Listen, Shouyou, we've talked about this already. I just think it'd be best for you to stay with your mother."

Hinata looked like he was about to cry and he sounded like it, too.

"But you don't understand," he said. "I-I really don't like it here. Mom, she... She isn't very, uh... She's not very nice to me."

There was a pause. "In what way?"

"Well," Hinata began. "She-she always yells at me and calls me names and-and she h-hits me sometimes."

"Shouyou," his father began. "I'm sure it's not that bad. If you want, I can talk to her an-"

"No!" Hinata was crying now. "No, it's not just her, either, it's her boyfriend too! He-he started hitting me the other day, and it's hard to play volleyball because of it a-and it really h-hurts and..." He let out a sob. "Please believe me, I'm not making this up, I promise. I'm-I'm not safe here."

"Are there marks?"

"Yes," Hinata said hopefully. "Everywhere."

There was a sigh. "Where are you right now?"

"I'm at the school."

"Well listen," Hinata's father said. "I'll come pick you up when school's over and look you over. Then I'll decide if you need to come live with me from now on."

"Thank you," Hinata cried. "Promise me you won't tell mom?"

"I promise, kiddo."

He hung up the phone after they said goodbye and looked at Kageyama.

"Do you think he'll actually do something about it?" Kageyama asked.

"I hope so."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel like his dad thinks of this as kind of a nuisance. idk.


	15. What Happened

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> from hinata's perspective.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING for a more graphically described panic attack as well as verbal abuse and idk if there's much of a trigger here for physical abuse because it's not heavily described but it's still there.   
> stay safe my dudes.

_Ungrateful bastard._

_Whiny bitch._

_Were you out there crying to your little boyfriend?_

_I wish I got your sister instead of you._

Hinata adds these onto the list of insults that roll through his head. Nonetheless, he's glad it's him that's there instead of his sister. He's glad he could spare her the mental and physical pain that comes with the abuse.

He's even deprived of food when he gets home from a long day of school and practice. His mother would usually ask him to cook, but now her boyfriend comes up with alternatives like ordering in or going out, so they barely even have anything in the house anymore. Even then, he's usually put to work the minute he walks in the door and ends up too exhausted to fix something and turns in to bed on an empty stomach.

Thinking now, his mind drifts back to the day he decided to tell his mother how unhappy he was.

"Mom," he said. "Can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Make it quick," she said, luckily not drunk.

"I was wondering if maybe... he... could not move in?"

She stood and flicked her cigarette in his face. "Now why would you want that?"

"B-because," Hinata had stuttered. "He's not very nice. I don't like him."

He barely managed to finish his sentence before he was suddenly staggering backwards, cheek stinging from the hard slap he was presented with. Unwilling to hear what profanities she'd scream at him next, Hinata ran for the stairs. He heard her boyfriend talking.

"I'll go teach him something."

He heard booming footsteps coming behind him and ran as fast as he could down the hallway and into his room, sadly unable to lock the door before it was whipped open again.

Then came the actual whipping. God, it hurt so much. Hinata thought his skin would surely be ripped to shreds, only to find out that it was just barely close to bleeding at all. During the fact, he called out to his mother for help that would never come, all while the man above him would yell down insults, calling him "ungrateful" and a "piece of shit."

That night, he wanted to call Kageyama. As he heard that awful man's footsteps fading, he slowly grabbed his phone and pressed the setter's contact. His finger hovered over the call button, but he couldn't bring himself to touch it.

 _Why_ , he thought to himself. _Why is everything like this? Why am I calling on Kageyama when he can't do anything? This all started the last time he tried to help._

The idea that his father would swoop in and save him was far fetched at best. His father wasn't a very caring man, but he was much more rational than his mother. Since he'd been separated from Natsu, he'd called her several times and she seemed to be having a good time at their father's. Good. Hinata couldn't stand the idea of his little sister being in a situation as toxic as his own.

Now, as he went through the motions of the school day, Hinata fidgeted in anticipation. Either his father actually _would_ save him, or he'd tell his mother what he said and make everything exponentially worse.

Oh, he could imagine it now. Getting home at the end of the day and immediately being cornered by the both of them. They'd probably take turns yelling at him and hitting him. Hitting him over, and over, and over, and over, and-

"Hinata," said his teacher. "Are you alright?"

He didn't realize it before, but he was breathing faster than usual and he was shaking and he was on the verge of tears.

Hinata shook his head before getting up from his desk and going into the bathroom, without asking for permission. Safely stowed away in a stall, he let himself cry. It was empty because everyone was in class and he was glad, because he was alone.

Or was he?

He pulled out his phone and once again allowed his finger to hover over Kageyama's contact, eventually typing out a message.

_"Bathroom. South wing. Come now please."_

All that was left to do was wait for Kageyama to come. He'd surely come right? Hinata picked up the phone and sent another message.

_"I need you."_

Kageyama came after a short while and went inside calling his name.

"Hinata," he asked.

The redhead pushed open the door of the stall he was crouched down in and Kageyama came over to where he was and crouched down in front of him.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

"I'm..." Hinata hesitated. "I can't."

His breathing picked up and he could feel his chest constrict. He gasped for air, drowning in a sea of fear and emotion. He was dying. _Surely_ he was dying. Oxygen was just out of reach, taunting him, refusing to enter his starving lungs.

"Shouyou!"

Suddenly, he was being pulled out of this dark, dark pool. Whose voice was saving him from drowning? He felt a hand on his shoulder and saw eyes staring into his. They were an ocean of deep blue. The lips on that face were saying something.

"Breathe."

There was the voice again. Breathe? How? He was drowning, he was _dying_. His lungs were aching, screaming for air. He wanted nothing but to indulge in the oxygen around him, but it was too far away, clinching from his every reach.

"Come on, just breathe."

With one final attempt, oxygen came flooding into his chest. His lungs were on fire and his head was pounding, white dancing across his vision in sync with his pounding heartbeat. His head still felt like it was underwater, but at least he was breathing somehow.

"Match your breathing with mine," said the voice.

Hinata looked down to see the chest on the body in front of him rising and falling with breath. He slowed his breathing almost enough to match it and his vision came back. He saw Kageyama kneeling in front of him in the school bathroom.

"Are you alright?" Kageyama asked.

Hinata nodded, and then got a better look at the setter. He looked terrified to say the least, his eyes were wide and he looked like he was shaking.

"Are _you_ okay?" Hinata asked.

"Of course, dumbass," Kageyama said without the bite his voice usually had. "I'm not the one who just had a panic attack."

The decoy leaned back on the wall of the stall and continued to catch his breath. Kageyama stood and offered him a hand.

"Are you okay to go back to class?"

Hinata nodded and took the hand, the two of them making their way out of the bathroom and back down the hallway to their respective classes.


	16. The Storm Will Pass

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've had this chapter planned in my head for so long and i'm especially excited for the end. thanks for reading!

When Kageyama got the first message from Hinata, he raised his hand immediately to be excused to the restroom. When he was walking down the hallway, he got the second message.

_"I need you."_

Kageyama picked up the pace and went into the bathroom to find Hinata on the brink of panic. When the decoy started having a panic attack, and a bad one at that, Kageyama was terrified. He'd had panic attacks before, himself, and he wouldn't wish them on anyone. Especially not Hinata.

Trying to help him through it was basically just Kageyama trying to make sure the redhead was breathing. He just wouldn't _breathe_ and he was going to pass out if Kageyama didn't do something. Apparently, just being with him and telling him to calm down had been enough. Not wanting to cause him another panic attack, Kageyama didn't ask questions.

At the end of the day, they told Daichi that Hinata and Kageyama would be late to practice if they even showed up at all. Explaining that it was important, the captain looked worried, but let them go without a question.

"Kageyama," Hinata said, pulling on his sleeve. "He's here."

Sure enough, a small car was pulling into the school parking lot and stopped in front of them. When the car stopped, a man with red hair that was only slightly more tame than Hinata's got out of the car. He stopped in front of his son.

"Who's this?"

"My friend," Hinata said. "His name's Kageyama. Kageyama, this is my dad."

Kageyama bowed.

"It's nice to meet you," Hinata's father said. "Now, Shouyou, do you want to talk somewhere privately?"

"Actually," Hinata started. "Can Kageyama come?"

Hinata's father sighed before nodding and they went and sat on a bench on campus, though Hinata's father stayed standing, pacing back and forth.

"Did you want to see them?" Hinata asked, staring at the ground. "The marks."

"I guess," his father said.

Something came to Kageyama's mind. How could a man as tense and as business-like as this and a woman as messed up as Hinata's mother raise such a bright, sunny child?

When Hinata's father lifted up his shirt a little, he immediately gasped at the bruising that lie underneath. Tears came to Hinata's eyes.

"Do you believe me now?"

Hinata turned back around and his father put his hands on his shoulders.

"You're skinnier, too," the man said with a sigh, and Kageyama realized that, compared to the beginning of the year, he was. "I'll tell you what. I can't just take you out of the house without your mother knowing, so I'll have to talk to her first. Then I'll talk to the lawyers and see if I can get custody of you, okay?"

Hinata sniffled and nodded. "Will I have to go back there today?"

"Maybe, maybe not. I'll see what I can do."

They said their goodbyes and his father went immediately to talk to his ex wife. It was strange how Hinata's father seemed opposed to showing his son any affection at all, but at least he had the decency to be at least slightly appalled by the sight of his son so hurt. Kageyama watched him drive away before Hinata turned to him.

"Can you tell that he doesn't want me?"

It was like a spear through the heart to Kageyama. Your parents were supposed to be the ones who loved you the most but Hinata's weren't like that. As if to add to the glum mood, storm clouds covered the sky and the first few raindrops fell on them.

"The storm will pass," Kageyama muttered.

"What?"

Kageyama looked down at Hinata, the raindrops mixing with the tears in the redhead's eyes.

"Nothing."

-

The two decided to go to the club room for shelter, and so Hinata would have a more private place to let his emotions out- they had time before anyone would need to go in there. He just kind of sat in the corner and pulled his knees up to his chest, crying silently.

Seeing Hinata cry made Kageyama angry. _Livid_. He felt anger situate in the pit of his stomach and he wanted to crush someone.

After almost thirty minutes, Hinata finally stopped crying. He wiped his face and stared anxiously at his phone on the floor. His eyes were red and puffy and he looked tired.

"You any better?" Kageyama asked.

Hinata shrugged. "I hate crying. I hate that I cry so much."

"You're allowed to cry," Kageyama said. "It's okay."

"But it's not ok-ay," the redhead said, voice cracking.

Just then, thunder crashed and it seemed to be a breaking point. Hinata cried out and he let his sobs shamelessly ring throughout the room.

"I h-hate this," he said between sobs.

Kageyama got up and went across the room to where the shorter teen sat. He sat down next to him and awkwardly rubbed his back. The first time Kageyama hugged him, he'd done it on an impulse. He didn't know if he'd be able to bring himself to do it again now.

"The storm will pass," Kageyama said again, louder this time.

"What?"

"The storm will pass," he repeated. "Like, the rain will stop eventually. And, you know, it also works metaphorically."

Hinata sniffled and looked up at him. "I don't follow."

Jeeze, now he'd have to explain everything, no matter how cheesy it sounds.

"You know, like... The situation you're in, it's like a storm. It's really bad, and it sucks, but it won't last forever. Your dad could help, or something else could change. It'll pass, just like a storm."

Hinata breathed a light scoff. "The storm may pass, but sometimes the damage it leaves is just as bad as the storm itself."

Kageyama felt a stab in his heart. It seemed like Hinata, the person who once radiated so much sunshine, was giving up hope. He didn't seem to think that his dad would be able to help or that anything would get any better.

"There's always those people who clean up damage from storms and stuff," Kageyama said. "You know... What are they called?"

"Cleanup and Restoration Services," Hinata supplied.

"Something like that," the setter replied. "Anyways, there's always those people to help and that's what I'll be to you, okay? I'll help fix everything."

Hinata was calm again and rested his head on Kageyama's shoulder.

"Thanks."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am ACTUALLY kageyama.   
> one of the people that inspired this story is over rn and i'm really happy. ; )   
> i don't know why this is so popular honestly but i'm so glad people like it.


	17. Worse Still

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> read a note at the end about further updates. it's important!

Hinata's phone rang.

When it did so, the redhead jumped and looked up at Kageyama in horror. He was afraid to pick it up.

"Go on," Kageyama said quietly. "It'll be okay."

Hinata reached for his phone and reluctantly picked it up. He answered it and put it on speaker.

"H-Hello?"

"Hey, Shouyou," the man said. "Listen, I tried to talk to her-"

"No," Hinata suddenly said, panic stricken. "No, is she not letting me go?" His voice was thick with tears now and his next few words sounded more like sobs. "No, no, no, she knows now that I told you and she's gonna be so mad at me, and-"

"Shouyou," his father said. "Calm down. I can see how upset you are, but-"

"You don't understand," Hinata said urgently. " _They're gonna hurt me_."

"Can you just bear it a little while longer?" The man asked. "Only a few days- a week at the most. I'm going to call the lawyer right after this and see what I can do."

"I can't do it," he was full on sobbing now. "I can't, I can't."

His father sighed. "Hey, come on now. I know you can do this."

"I'm just not going home," Hinata said, suddenly rebellious. "I have plenty of friends who would let me stay with them, I'm not going home."

"Shouyou, you can't do that. I could get in trouble and you'd obviously get into trouble."

"I don't care, I'm not going back there. Especially not now that she knows I told you."

"Listen, Shou, I-"

Hinata hung up the phone. Kageyama looked at him for a moment before the decoy looked up at him.

"Is it okay if I stay over at your house?"

"Sure," Kageyama said. "Of course."

They continued to sit in sad silence for a while before they heard the rest of the team coming up the stairs and scrambled away from each other so no one would see Kageyama with his arm around Hinata, the latter leaning into him.

When the other boys crashed into the room, their talk and laughter stopped short when they saw a very distraught Hinata sitting next to a concerned Kageyama on the floor.

"Oh, Hinata," Daichi said. "There's someone outside looking for you."

The redhead sighed, standing. "It's probably my dad again."

He and Kageyama stood and walked out the door and Hinata's heart almost stopped beating. He brought his hands up to his face and was on the verge of breaking down in front of everyone. Kageyama put his hands on Hinata's shoulders just in time for him to start hyperventilating. A couple of the boys staggered back a bit, but Suga was there by his side immediately.

"Shouyou," yelled his mother. "Stop crying and get down here."

But his feet seemed like they were rooted to the ground.

"I'm sorry," Daichi spoke up. "I don't know if I should let him go with you."

"Shouyou," said his mother in a warning tone. "Get over here. Now."

Hinata forced himself to take a step forward and before he knew it, he was standing in front of her.

"I don't want to go," he said, this being his last attempt at defiance. He tried to hide the waver in his voice.

She grabbed his arm and opened the car door.

"Get in the damn car," she said. "We need to talk."

Kageyama didn't hear what she said next as she shoved Hinata into the car, not receiving much of a struggle from the teen. The redhead looked longingly out the window as she got into the car and locked the doors, as if he'd attempt a tuck and roll.

"What was that about?" Tanaka asked.

"Things are just complicated-" Suga began, before Kageyama cut him off.

"It's none of your business," the raven haired setter said before he could stop himself.

-

Hinata didn't come to school the next day. Or the day after that. Kageyama could only assume the worst, and it was confirmed when Hinata came back after two days. His lip was, once again, split and his eye had green and purple bruising around it. He wore a deep frown and walked with a slight limp.

"Hey," was all Kageyama could bring himself to say.

Hinata only responded with a hum and the two went on walking into the gym. Hinata stopped him by the door.

"What?" Kageyama asked.

"I don't want to go in."

"Why?"

"I don't want to see how they'll react," Hinata replied. "Or hear the questions."

"I'll go in and tell them not to say anything," Kageyama said. Problem solved.

"Okay, I guess."

Hinata sat down on the gym steps and Kageyama went in.

"Oi," he said. "Listen up. Hinata's back but he's hurt and doesn't want anyone asking questions. Okay?"

"Wait," Nishinoya said. "How'd he get hurt? Who would hurt him?"

Tsukishima raised his eyebrows. "Do you not remember what happened the last time any of us saw him?"

"Oh."

Kageyama went back outside to get Hinata.

"Hey," he said. Hinata jumped and Kageyama realized that his voice was stern. "You should come in now," he said with a softer voice.

Hinata stood with a nod and a wince. He obviously wouldn't be playing volleyball any time soon. Kageyama felt bad that the redhead had to cycle to and from school every day.

When they walked in, everyone was quiet. Okay, well at least they weren't asking questions. Hinata just stared at the ground upon entering and walked right over to Daichi.

"I can't practice," he said, still avoiding eye contact. "But can I still come anyways? Just to watch."

"Oh- of course," Daichi said. "It's fine. And whatever you need, just come to us, okay?"

Hinata nodded, still avoiding any and all eye contact. He limped his way over to the bench and sat down. It took a while before everyone stopped staring at him, but Hinata paid no mind, simply keeping his gaze fixed on the floor.

When practice ended, Kageyama walked with Hinata to class, making sure to slow down as the redhead walked slower due to whatever injury he was hiding under his clothes. The decoy was silent all day. He wouldn't even talk to Kageyama and when the setter invited him over to his house, he got a displeasing answer.

"I'm not allowed going over anymore."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay, so i might be going on a hiatus.  
> my mom thinks it'd be best for me to stay at a hospital while we take control of my mental health and i don't know when or for how long.  
> i'm not giving up on this and i may or may not update before then, but i'm not really sure what's going to happen. i'm sorry.


	18. Needing The Light

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hinata was the light Kageyama needed. Now, that light threatened to go out forever. Kageyama couldn't let that happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm back!  
> sorry this is so short, i tried to write it fast so i could post it by monday but that didn't really work out.   
> let me know what you think!

That was it. How could he help anymore? Kageyama had done all he could and each time it backfired on him completely. And now Hinata wasn't even allowed coming over anymore.

Suddenly, Kageyama didn't know if he'd be able to save his friend.

His best friend. Kageyama wasn't exactly _social_ and didn't have any friends outside the volleyball team. Hinata was his best friend, the one he most enjoyed spending time with, the one he thought of the most.

Maybe he was even more than a best friend.

No, no, he couldn't be thinking like that. Hinata didn't need that kind of a distraction when this was going on. The redhead should focus on himself, not on Kageyama's feelings. He needed to just stop and pay more attention to his friend who was having much greater issues than Kageyama was having.

The setter walked home. Alone. Hinata seemed to be wary of his presence and insisted on walking home alone- Kageyama assumed that he didn't want his mother seeing them together.

 _But what else could Kageyama do?_ That was the question. He planned to just have Hinata over to his house after practice each day so he wouldn't have to go home, but he couldn't do that anymore. Maybe the redhead's dad would actually come through for him? The setter wasn't sure. Could Hinata hold out just a little longer?

Kageyama hated to think of it. He hated to think of Hinata spending even a little longer in that house. When the decoy came back to school after being gone for two days due to his injuries, he was different. Completely different. He'd lost his glow. Hinata was always like the sun personified, but now the storm clouds were perpetually blocking his light.

Kageyama needed that light.

Once home, thunder starting to rumble, he got out his phone and texted Hinata. Just a hello, just enough to get the spiker to respond. He stares at his phone and waits for an answer until a text finally comes back.

_"Hi."_

As Kageyama is responding with a _"how are you,"_ another text comes.

_"Can I call you?"_

Kageyama responds with a yes and his phone starts ringing almost immediately.

"Hey," Kageyama says when he answers the phone.

"Hi," Hinata replies.

The silence that follows is long and deafening and Kageyama decides to break it.

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah," says the redhead. "I guess."

"What's going on?" Kageyama asks, needing to make conversation.

"Nothing," Hinata says. "I just..." There's a pause and the teen takes a breath. "I just didn't want to be alone."

"Are you alone there?"

"Yes."

His voice is tame and quiet and there's nothing remotely _Hinata_ about it.

"So..." Kageyama was at a loss for words. "What, uh... What hap-"

"I think it's pretty obvious," Hinata snapped. In the tense silence that followed, Kageyama heard the decoy take a deep breath. "I didn't go to the doctor after... it happened, but I've probably got a rib or two that's broken or bruised at the least, I twisted my ankle, and I've probably still got a concussion."

"That... That sounds awful," Kageyama said. "I'm sor-"

"Don't be," Hinata said, interrupting him again. "Just... don't."

They were silent yet again for a while, listening to the rain and the quiet thunder. Hinata would gasp every now and then whenever the storm would get a bit louder and Kageyama was just glad that he could be there for him. Well, as "there" as he could be from the other side of a mountain. The rain soon calmed to a slow drizzle and Hinata spoke again.

"I've gotta go do chores," he said. "Bye."

He hung up and Kageyama went back to thinking. And thinking. And he kept thinking throughout dinner and the rest of the evening and even into the early morning. With few hours of sleep, he began another day.

When he got to where he met Hinata every morning, he waited. And waited. Before too long, he assumed that the decoy just went ahead without him and made his way to the school. When he got to the club room, he walked in and found Hinata talking to Suga with a tired smile.

"What's going on?" Kageyama asked.

"My dad just called," Hinata replied. "He said he's getting me from school at some point today to talk to the police about... you know... what's been going on."

Kageyama felt a smile tug at his lips. "That's- This is great!"

"I'm just glad it'll be over soon."

The three smiled and began to walk out of the room and towards the gym.

"When can I play again?" Hinata asked.

"That depends," Suga replied. "How bad are your injuries?"

At the exact same time, Kageyama responded saying, "bad," and Hinata responded saying "not bad."

Suga raised his eyebrows. "Which is it?"

Hinata glared at Kageyama and the setter glared right back.

"They're bad," Kageyama stepped up and said. "He says he thinks he's got a broken rib and he's getting over a concussion."

"Sorry, Hinata," Suga said, patting his shoulder lightly and starting to walk away.

Hinata stood there, just glaring at Kageyama for a second before sighing walking behind Suga. Kageyama couldn't be bothered by it, though- the dumbass needed more time to recover whether he liked it or not and he'd get over it eventually. Kageyama was excited. He was happy that Hinata would finally be getting out of that house. Maybe he'd get his light back.


	19. We've Made It This Far

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wish things would turn out as good as this irl.

It was during English class that Hinata's father picked him up from school. After that, Kageyama fidgeted in his seat, completely zoned out of everything around him, and tapped his pencil until he was hushed by several people. As soon as the teacher wasn't looking, he grabbed his phone and texted Hinata.

_"How's everything going?"_

Hinata didn't answer until class was over and Kageyama was heading towards his next class.

_"We're at the police station. My dad's talking with a social worker I think."_

_"Nervous?"_ Kageyama typed.

_"Yeah. I gotta go. They want to talk to me."_

Kageyama could only assume that he was being called back to speak with the police. The setter said a silent prayer that things would work out. Things _had_ to work out.

-

"The social worker would like to speak with you," Hinata's father said after he came out of a door to the left of where Hinata sat.

The decoy nodded and stood, walking into the room. When he walked in, a police officer sat at a table with a woman with red hair, just like his.

"Hello, Hinata," the woman said. "Take a seat."

Hinata sat in the chair in front of them and next to his dad.

"Now," the woman began. "I see that you're injured- your face is bruised and you were obviously limping when you came in. Can you tell me how you got hurt?"

"My, uh," Hinata began, so quiet he was barely audible. "My mom and her boyfriend."

The woman wrote something down and turned back to him. "How long has this been happening for?"

"I don't know, the first time was... about a month ago? A month and a half maybe?"

"Can you describe to me what it was like living with her before this all started?"

Hinata thought before responding. "She was never home. She never paid attention to me and it seemed like I was the one taking care of her."

More words were written on the woman's paper. "Okay," she said. "And you said her boyfriend was hurting you as well?"

The redhead nodded and felt his father stiffen slightly. Hinata looked up to see him looking ready to kill. After a moment, his father took a deep breath and spoke up.

"You're doing great, Shou," he said. "I'm sorry. I know this can't be easy."

If his father was showing this much concern, then things must be more serious than Hinata thought they were.

"Okay," said the social worker. "All I need now is to get some pictures of your bruises. For evidence."

Evidence. So they were prosecuting against his mother and her boyfriend? Hinata wasn't sure if he wanted to go through with this anymore. He didn't want to show anyone how badly he was hurt and he certainly didn't want his mother to go to jail.

"I don't," he began. "I don't want to..."

The woman smiled knowingly. "I know this is hard, but I promise it'll be real quick."

Deciding that he wasn't getting out of here without taking pictures first, he reluctantly agreed. He stood and the woman left the room. The officer that stayed told him to take his shirt off and he did so, wincing at the movement that sent pain searing through his ribs. He shut his eyes and heard cameras clicking before he was asked to roll up his pants so they could see his ankle, which was as dark and purple as his abdomen and his chest.

"I recommend that you take him to a hospital for treatment," said the officer quietly to Hinata's father. "And you should keep him with you. He's not going back to that house."

His father walked up to him and put a hand on his shoulder. "Let's go," he said.

-

Kageyama checked his phone again and again and _finally_ got another message from Hinata.

_"Everything's okay. Going to the hospital with dad and then to his house."_

_"Great,"_ Kageyama responded. _"What's going to happen with your mom?"_

_"I don't know. She'll probably get arrested. I feel bad."_

Kageyama frowned. _"Why?"_

_"I don't know. She's my mom."_

_"A mom shouldn't treat you like that."_

Kageyama waited for the next message which took an eternity to come.

_"Well maybe I deserved it."_

Kageyama couldn't believe his eyes. Why on Earth would that dumbass think he deserved any of this? He was the sun's incarnate, an angel personified. How could someone like that think they deserved to be hurt by the person who was supposed to love them the most?

 _"You can't possibly think that,"_ Kageyama typed.

_"I don't know."_

After that, Hinata didn't respond to anything he said.

-

Hinata showed up to school the next day with a boot on his foot. He was coming from a different direction than before which proved that he'd stayed with his father that night. Good. At least he didn't have to go back to that house.

"Hi," Kageyama said, eagerly awaiting a response.

"Hey," Hinata said. "My ankle's sprained pretty bad. Other than that I've just got a cracked rib."

"Oh," Kageyama replied. "That sucks."

They walked in silence for a while, Kageyama not knowing what to say and Hinata just not _wanting_ to say anything. When they approached the gym, Hinata stopped him by putting his arm across where Kageyama was walking. The decoy's head was down and the setter couldn't see what his face looked like.

"What?" Kageyama asked.

Hinata turned and wrapped his arms around his setter in one swift movement. He fisted his hands in the back of Kageyama's shirt.

"Thank you," he whispered. "Thank you so much."

Kageyama, recovering from his shock, returned the gesture and wrapped his arms around the shorter of the two, burying his nose in his orange hair.

"For what," he asked. "I didn't do anything."

"Yes you did," Hinata declared, face still buried in Kageyama's chest. "I don't think I would've made it this far without you."

"Do you still think that all of this is your fault?"

Hinata was quiet. His arms tightened around the younger, yet taller boy.

"I don't know," he began. "I'd like to think it's not, but she was such a good mother before things went bad. I find it hard to believe that she'd hurt me like this without me doing anything to deserve it."

"Hinata," Kageyama said, pulling away from the hug and putting his hands on the decoy's shoulders. "You have got to be kidding me."

"What?"

"This isn't your fault. Your mom... People that would hurt their own kid... They're messed up. Up here," he said, pointing to his head. "That's not your fault."

Hinata hung his head. "I guess," he said before turning and walking into the gym.

Kageyama swore to himself that he wouldn't rest until he made sure that dumbass was okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter is an epilogue. thanks for sticking with me this long! i don't think there'll be a sequel so thank you so much for reading.


	20. Epilogue

It's been almost a month since Hinata moved in with his father and his sister. He looks better than ever.

Kageyama noticed that the dark circles under the decoy's eyes have disappeared and he's more energetic now. It took a few days for him to get out of the deep pool of depression he was in, but he managed to swim his way to the surface. Despite that, he still had his moments where he'd get more upset than usual, but a little bit of emotional instability could only be expected considering what he'd been through.

Hinata usually spent the nights at Kageyama's house. He wasn't fond of his father, who seemed to like Natsu much more than his eldest child.

"He's so much better than my mom," Hinata said. "But he just seems to love Natsu so much but doesn't really care about me."

Hinata could live with that. His father nurtured him more than his mother ever did and he was thankful, even if the situation wasn't completely ideal.

-

It was storming yet again, and Kageyama was lying in bed awaiting the phone call that he was bound to get from Hinata. He waited and waited and eventually fell asleep, never getting the call. When Kageyama went to school the next morning, he found Hinata in the club room as jumpy and energetic as ever.

"Were you okay last night?" Kageyama asked. "With the storm?"

"Of course," Hinata exclaimed. "I was fine! I wasn't alone this time. I didn't have anything to be afraid of."

Kageyama almost smiled before he caught himself and managed to keep a straight face.

"Good," he said.

Hinata smiled. "Were you _worried_ about me Yama?"

"Pfft," Kageyama said. "No. I was just... Wondering. That's all."

The decoy gasped. "You were worried! Aw, Yama, you don't need to worry about me!"

"I wasn't!" Kageyama said, grabbing Hinata's hair. "And stop calling me that!"

"What should I call you then?" Hinata giggled. "Kageyama gets boring. I need a nickname."

"Just call me Tobio, alright?"

Hinata went quiet for a second before saying, "Are you sure?"

Kageyama nodded. "Yeah."

"Okay," the middle blocker said, smiling. "Then you should call me Shouyou."

Kageyama let go of Hinata's head and the two boys exited the club room and went into the gym.

-

That evening, Kageyama got to thinking. He thought of Hinata, of how he's out of danger now, but also of how he might be dealing with things mentally. Unable to resist, he pressed the decoy's contact and called.

"Hey, Kageyama," Hinata answered. "What's going on? Why are you calling so late?"

"I just wanted to..." He already sounded awkward. Abort mission. "Never mind."

"Wait," Hinata said. "I know something's on your mind. Spill."

Kageyama sighed. "I just wanted to see how you were doing."

The redhead laughed. "I'm doing fine, you worry too much!"

"No," the setter said. "Like... Do you still think it's your fault? The... The _abuse_?"

Hinata was quiet and Kageyama eagerly waited for a response.

"I don't know."

"Well," Kageyama began. "Don't. You shouldn't think that. There's no way you could've done anything to warrant that kind of punishment. You're great."

"Was that a compliment?" Hinata exclaimed. "Oh, Sappyyama, thank you!"

"Stop trying to avoid the situation," Kageyama said. "I know that's what you're doing."

The decoy sighed. "I told you I don't know. I don't know what to think, I don't want it to be my fault, but I also don't want it to be my mom's. I feel bad for her and I still love her. I just... I don't know why though. She treated me like shit but I still can't help but love her."

"Hinata," the setter began. "I know you don't like it, but it's her fault. It just is, okay? I understand that you love her, though I can't imagine why, but please try to understand that she's the one that messed up. Not you."

"I just," Hinata's voice was wavering now and went higher with each word. "I just don't know what's wrong with me. I'm just always sad and I get so mad sometimes and I don't know why I still love her so much and I just- I think I'm _broken_ , Yama, _I'm broken."_

He continued to cry and Kageyama didn't know what to do.

"You," he began. "Are not broken. You're not. You're..." What was that metaphor he used before? "This is just the aftermath of the storm. Like when there are branches on the ground, and your bike is all stuck in the mud, and it's all dreary and stuff, and it really sucks and it's really depressing. Maybe your house is damaged or a tree collapsed or something. But it won't be like that forever. You can always pick up the branches, and the mud clears up, and the weather will be better, and you can fix your roof or whatever."

"Like your stupid Cleanup and Restoration Services metaphor," Hinata said.

"Exactly," Kageyama said with a laugh.

An awkward silence followed.

"Thanks again," Hinata said. "For... everything."

"No problem. I'd gladly do it all over again."

"I've gotta go," Hinata said. "I still have homework to finish."

"Okay," Kageyama replied. "Talk to you tomorrow?"

"Mhm," the decoy tiredly hummed. "Goodnight."

Kageyama smiled at his tired friend.

"Goodnight."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading. i'm glad so many people love this story, it was one of my favorite ones to write.   
> if you or anyone you know is going through anything similar than hinata in this story, or abuse of any kind, then please tell a parent or other adult immediately.   
> thanks again for reading!


	21. You're Not Alone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> super short thingy but i might add some other oneshot type things as time goes on

Kageyama rushed into the gym, Hinata by his side. The redhead was bouncing just as much as usual. He'd been looking and acting better and happier than ever as of late. Things were going up quickly.

It had been almost another month since Hinata moved in with his father and sister. His father wasn't the kindest, but he was exponentially better than Hinata's mother. They'd butt heads a lot, but the redhead was in a far better place.

And now, their team was at nationals. If you'd told them several months ago that they'd be here, they wouldn't believe you. But, here they are.

"Gwaaah!" Hinata's voice rang out. "This gym is _huge_!"

"You're just saying that because you're so small," Kageyama replied.

Hinata turned to him angrily. "Oh yeah? Well this 'small' guy can kick your ass!"

"Pipe down," Daichi called behind them. "You guys are on the same team, remember?"

The two growled at each other before walking forward towards the locker room. The players looked to the stands, eyes scanning the crowd for their families. They spotted them and waved. Well, everyone but Hinata, that is.

When the boys reached the locker room, Hinata was quiet. He silently changed his clothes and shoes, Kageyama watching him in worry. He waited until everyone else left before holding Hinata behind.

"What's wrong with you," he asked.

"Nothing," Hinata replied with a sigh. "I'm fine. Let's just go."

The middle blocker brushed past him and into the large gym, Kageyama huffing in frustration before following suit. They made their way out onto the court to warm up, but Hinata still wasn't on his game. He was missing easy spikes and was slow and sloppy in his receives.

"Hinata," Coach Ukai called. "Why don't you come here for a sec?"

The redhead frowned even deeper as he made his way over. Kageyama watched as the coach put his hand on the decoy's shoulder and talked to him. Hinata's back was to him, but the setter could've sworn he saw Hinata wiping at his eyes a couple of times. Ukai looked sad. Pitying. He gave the middle blocker a final slap on the back before he turned and made his way back over to the team.

Kageyama would like to say that their little pep talk helped, but it didn't. The coach didn't put Hinata in the starting lineup.

They lost the first set.

They had a brief break during which Kageyama decided to solve things once and for all.

"What's the matter with you?"

Hinata looked up at him. "It's stupid."

"Well so are you," Kageyama replied. "So just spill it."

"I... I hate seeing everyone else's families here and not mine. I'm... _jealous_ , I guess."

Kageyama was stunned into silence before he nodded slowly.

"Okay," he said. "But there are people in that crowd supporting you."

Hinata scoffed. "Oh, yeah? Who?"

"Well, my parents, for one." The pair looked up to see Mr. and Mrs. Kageyama holding up not only a sign with a number nine on it, but one with a ten on it as well. "And your friends from junior high." They looked up a little farther and saw Kouji and Izumi waving down at them. "And the rest of us are on your side, too."

Little did Kageyama know that the rest of the team had been listening in on what he had to say.

"Yeah," Tanaka said. "We're with you one hundred percent!"

"You can always count on your awesome senpais," Nishinoya yelled.

The rest of the boys just nodded along.

"You're not alone," Yachi said, handing everyone water bottles.

Hinata sighed and wiped a stray tear from his face.

"Thank you," he said. "All of you. I don't know what I'd do without your support."

The whistle blew.

"Hinata," Ukai said. "Are you good to go now?"

The redhead smiled brightly. "Yeah!"


	22. A Nightmare.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> super short thingy. Stronger will be updated soon. love you all.

The belt.

He was taking off his belt.

"Take your shirt off," he said.

"No," Hinata breathed. "No, please, not again, I-"

"Take your goddamn shirt off!"

Hinata wouldn't. The man took one long stride towards him and grabbed him roughly, ripping the shirt off of him. Hinata screamed. He yelled to his mother, who was downstairs, no doubt listening to all the conflict. He screamed for her to save him.

She never came.

His shirt was now off and he was kneeling on the floor, his bare, scarred back facing the man. Just as he heard him whip the belt back, Hinata let out the loudest scream he could.

"Hinata!"

The redhead screamed as he shot upright. He felt hands on him. He wanted the hands off. He screamed and kicked and hit and cried until his vision went white and he couldn't breathe anymore. He got a glimpse of Suga's face in front of him and remembered. He was at a training camp in Tokyo. He wasn't at his mother's house. He'd never go to his mother's house again.

Hinata stopped swinging his fists around and brought his hands to his face as he sobbed hysterically. Suga's arms were quick to wrap around him until he was almost sitting in the third year's lap, leaning into his chest and wailing full-force. He was vaguely aware of the door opening and their coach and advisor running in, hair disheveled and feet bare.

He was also vaguely aware of Suga pulling him into a standing position and leading him into the hallway of the dorm, down to the common room. When Hinata finally calmed down enough to stop crying, Suga was leading him to the couch and sitting down with him, letting him bury his face in Suga's shirt.

"Hinata," Coach Ukai said. "Are you okay?"

He nodded. "I just... I thought I was..." He covered his face as fresh tears rolled down his face.

They heard footsteps and saw Kageyama coming down the hallway.

"Did you dream about being back in that house?" Kageyama asked.

All Hinata could do was nod as he broke down again.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I-I don't want to be cr-crying like th-this, I just... I got so scared."

Suga hugged him tighter and Kageyama came and sat on the other side of him.

"Do you have nightmares like this a lot?" Suga asked.

"Sometimes."

The room was silent for a moment and Hinata took that time to just breathe. He had a headache and his throat hurt from all the crying. He was also embarrassed. Extremely so.

"I'm sorry, guys," he said, sitting up and regaining his composure.

"It's fine, Hinata," Takeda said. "Please, just let us know if you need anything."

"We'll be going back to our dorm," Ukai said. "You guys take as long as you need, but make sure you get enough sleep for practice tomorrow."

The adults left and Hinata leaned back against the couch, turning so his face was on Kageyama's shoulder.

"You okay, Shouyou?" Suga asked, rubbing his back. "You were really panicking there. Do you want to talk about it? Sometimes it helps."

"I did something bad," he began. "But I don't know what it was. He- my mom's boyfriend- was in my room. He was taking off his belt and I... It's always the same nightmare. He hits me over and over and over again."

"But you don't live with him anymore," Kageyama said. "You're safe. I'll never let that bastard touch you ever again."

"None of us will," Suga said.

"I know," Hinata replied, sitting back up.

"Let's get back to bed," Suga suggested. "We have a long day tomorrow."


	23. Remember That Time...?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the italicized part takes place way at the beginning, before this story even starts.

_Kageyama walked into the gym. He expected to be the first one there, but, irritatingly enough, he wasn't. The only one there was that annoying shortie with the orange hair. What was his name? Hinata?_

_And what the hell was on his neck?_

_On the right side of his neck was a long bruise that began to form a ring before fading, and then resumed on the other side of his neck._

_His bald-headed senpai, Tanaka, walked in behind him. He smiled._

_"Whoa, Hinata," he said. "Did you forget the safe word?"_

_Hinata looked over at them and his face reddened. He shook his head. It was the quietest that Kageyama had ever seen the redhead._

_There was one thing, though, that Kageyama couldn't get out of his head- who in the hell would give Hinata hickeys that bad? And how could a dumbass like that get a date before Kageyama could?_

_Suga and Daichi walked in soon after. Their eyes immediately landed on the first year's neck._

_"What happened?" Suga asked._

_"I, uh-" Hinata stuttered. "Well, I-I- rug burn!"_

_"Rug burn?" Daichi mused._

_"Y-yeah," Hinata replied. "Rug burn."_

_"Okay," Suga said with a doubtful expression._

They went on with practice that day without a care. The incident was soon forgotten about, but now that Kageyama thinks about it, he should've known. Should've known something was off.

“Hey, Hinata,” he said that day as they walked into the gym.

The redhead looked up at him. “Yes?”

“Do you remember that time,” he began. “One of the first days of practice. You had that big bruise on your neck and everyone thought it was hickeys.”

Hinata nodded with pink cheeks.

“You said it was rug burn?”

Another nod.

“What really happened?”

Hinata stopped walking and Kageyama stopped as well. He stared at the spiker, who had his eyes trained on the ground.

“My mom,” he said. “She... She got really mad at me the day before.”

“So you lied before?” Kageyama stared at him with worried eyes. “When you told me she’d never hurt you before, you lied?”

The ginger nodded. “I don’t really remember what she was mad about. It doesn’t matter, really. But she grabbed a belt from my room and... Put it around my neck.”

Kageyama’s eyes went impossibly wider. “She tried to strangle you?”

Hinata’s head once again bobbed up and down. “Almost until I passed out.”

The two boys stood there in silence, the decoy still adamantly avoiding eye contact.

“How many times had she hurt you before?”

The words were barely audible. “A couple. But it wasn’t that often, I promise.”

Kageyama sighed and wrapped his arms around him. Hinata stiffened at first before relaxing into the touch. He didn’t realize tears were in his eyes until he started talking and his voice wavered.

“I’m sorry,” the setter said. “I’m... God, this is so messed up.”

“Hey,” Hinata soothed, pulling away and finally making eye contact with him. “It’s okay. It’s better now.”

“But it’s not,” Kageyama argued. “I saw you after that nightmare last week. You... You’re not okay. And it’s all because of that bitch-“

“Don’t talk about her like that.”

Kageyama looked down at the spiker and saw him frowning, his eyebrows knit together in a sad kind of anger.

“Sorry,” the setter replied.

Hinata sighed. “It’s fine. I don’t know why I still care about her so much. If I ever saw her again and she said she was sorry, I’m afraid I might actually believe her.”

Kageyama hugged him close again. He didn’t know what to say, so he didn’t say anything. They stood there for a long time before Hinata broke the embrace.

“Come on,” he said. “We’ll be late.”

They raced to the gym.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you can expect an update of Stronger by next tuesday.   
> i’d like to warn you about the next update for this story. i’m planning on putting Hinata’s point of view during chapter 17 while he’s forced to go home with his mother and her boyfriend. i plan on making this chapter more graphic so it could be triggering.


	24. The Worst One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This takes place during chapter seventeen when Hinata gets into the car and is driven away by his mother.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING for more graphically described abuse as well as homophobic slurs. stay safe my dudes.  
> ALSO: i just realized this has over 6000 hits and almost 500 kudos and um... WHAT?!! THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH!!!

Hinata stared as his friends faded from view. He put his hand on the window, silently pleading for them to save him.

 _Please_.

“Y’know,” his mother began. “You really are the most whiny _bitch_ I’ve ever met. I’ll bet that your sister isn’t even as much of a pussy as you are. You’ve whined enough to your little boyfriend, now you get your dad involved? C’mon, Shouyou, he doesn’t want you. _No one_ does.”

Hinata realized that there were tears streaming from his eyes and quickly wiped them away. He didn’t need his mom making fun of him for crying, too.

“Honestly,” she continued. “If you didn’t do all the laundry, I might tell you to go kill yourself.”

When they reached the house, Hinata’s stomach dropped. Her boyfriend’s car was in the driveway. She noticed him frozen in the backseat and banged on the window, beckoning him out. He slowly and shakily got out of the car and she grabbed his bicep, dragging him into the house.

Hinata’s shirt was immediately grabbed by his mother’s boyfriend and he was pinned to the wall, his head bouncing off the hard surface and his feet leaving the floor.

“You think you were being abused before?” The man asked. “Well you haven’t been through shit. Now you’re about to get it.”

Hinata was thrown to the ground with such force, the air left his lungs. He yelled at the impact and the man above him laughed and began to kick him. The ginger screamed with each kick and tears flowed down his cheeks.

“Stop,” he begged when the kicks slowed. “P-Please.”

His future step father got on the ground and grabbed his throat.

“I don’t think you’ve learned your lesson,” he said. “I think that when you get to go back to school, you’ll just go right back to telling your boyfriend about how bad you have it.”

“He’s not my boyf-friend,” Hinata whispered.

A punch landed on his face and he felt blood rushing from his nose and mouth.

“Don’t talk back to me,” the man said.

He landed a couple more punches on Hinata’s face before standing back up. The redhead began to crawl away and up the stairs. He only got so far before he felt a strong hand on his ankle and he was yanked down, falling down the steps and slamming his head on the ground.

The world went black.

When Hinata woke, the house was empty. He moved to stand but was hit with such an intense wave of dizziness that he fell back down. He crawled to the downstairs bathroom and kneeled in front of the toilet before throwing up due to the dizziness. Hinata was scared. His vision was warbled and black around the edges and white danced across his sight. He squeezed his eyes shut tight and groaned, but the groan just turned into a sob. He quietly cried as he reached into his pocket to find that his mother had taken his phone. Great.

The injured boy attempted to stand, but he couldn’t put any weight on his ankle the way it was.

Walking hurt. Breathing hurt. Everything hurt.

He decided to crawl to the kitchen to get some ice packs and then up to his room. It took a long time, but when he finally made it he just crashed on his bed with ice packs laying on the parts of his body that hurt the most.

When he woke next, it was to the sound of the front door slamming. It was four in the morning. They’d been out all night. Which probably meant his mom wasn’t going to work.

Hinata decided to go and try to clean himself up. He pushed himself up on the bed and saw that there was blood on his pillow. He dizzily made his way to the bathroom across the hall, basically hopping so he wouldn’t have to put any weight on his bad ankle. When he reached the mirror, he let out a sob.

His face was purple and covered in blood. His eyes were swollen and one of them was turning dark purple. He could see faint bruising on his neck and didn’t even want to see what his chest and abdomen looked like. He wiped the blood off his face and ran a bath, still keeping his eyes away from his bruises.

When Hinata walked out of the bathroom, he bumped into his mother’s boyfriend and fell to the ground with a thud and a yelp.

“What’re you doing up?” The man asked. He smiled. “Were you up crying to your friends about how _abused_ you are?” Hinata stayed silent and the man scoffed, lifting his beer to his lips and taking a drink before walking away. “Faggot.”

The redhead stood up. He could call his friends on the house phone, couldn’t he? But that would involve going downstairs to get the phone. And he did not want to risk getting another beating.

Hinata decided not to go to school that day. The pain and dizziness were way too bad. His mother didn’t make him go, either. He assumed that was because she found it too risky, that Hinata was too hurt and it would make people suspicious. He laid around all day until his mom gave him his phone back. When she did, she opened his bedroom door, threw it at him, and spoke.

“When you go back to school,” she said. “I don’t want you hanging out with that fag you brought over the other day.”

She turned and walked out the door, slamming it shut. He picked up the phone and turned it on, but the bright light made his head throb and his stomach clench, so he put it back down.

That night, he lay in bed and tried to find a comfortable position, which proved impossible. Everything just hurt so much. And now he wasn’t allowed to go to Kageyama’s again.

He cried himself to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry that i’ve been slow on updating Stronger, it’s just been hard to write lately. i’m trying to get an update ready for the beginning of next week. <3


	25. Roughhousing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roughhousing gone wrong.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> almost 7,300 hits.   
> more than 500 kudos.   
> thank you.

Hinata and Kageyama were walking to practice, a strawberry milk carton still in the latter’s hand. The setter sipped from it every now and then and Hinata watched.

“I’ve never had strawberry milk,” Hinata mused. “What does it taste like?”

Kageyama stopped walking and stared at him. “Strawberries.”

Hinata put his hands on his hips. “Well _duh_ , idiot. Of course it tastes like strawberries.”

“What was I supposed to say?”

“Here, let me try it,” Hinata said, reaching toward Kageyama’s milk.

“Hey! Dumbass, get off!”

Kageyama held the milk far above Hinata’s head and the spiker jumped on him, practically trying to climb him in order to reach the drink. Time seemed to go in slow motion as Kageyama toppled over, dropping his half-full milk on both of their heads and saturating them with what was left inside. Hinata squealed with laughter as he fell on top of the setter, but Kageyama didn’t think it was funny.

“God, you dumbass!”

He used his body weight to roll over, throwing Hinata off of him and then getting on top of him. Kageyama sat on him and held Hinata’s wrists down next to his head.

“Ah!” Hinata said, laughter lacing his voice. “I surrender! I surrender!”

Kageyama didn’t relent as Hinata struggled against his grip and before long, the redhead’s laughs turned into panicked cries. He struggled and struggled against the strong grip and suddenly he was back in that house, being held down by his mother’s large boyfriend and _oh, God, he was going to hurt him._

All too late, Kageyama realized that he really needed to let Hinata go. By the time he made that realization, Hinata was already crying and begging.

“Please let me go,” Hinata whimpered. “Please, I’m sorry, please, please, _please_!”

Kageyama quickly scrambled to get off of the middle blocker and Hinata sat up, wrapping his arms around his knees and hugging himself tightly. Kageyama slowly approached him, eyes wide with worry.

“Hey, it’s okay,” he said, slowly reaching out his hand. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have held you down.”

Hinata looked up and saw the large hand reaching out for him and let out a yelp, covering his head with his hands. He was in full-blown panic mode. This hadn’t happened in a long time and Kageyama almost forgot what he was supposed to do. Regaining his composure, he sat down in front of Hinata, but not too close.

“Look at me,” he said. Hinata didn’t. “Look at me, Hinata.” He still didn’t move. “ _Shouyou_.”

At the stern call, Hinata looked up at Kageyama with red-rimmed eyes and tears staining his cheeks.

“Breathe with me, Shouyou,” Kageyama said. “You’re safe. Nothing bad is going to happen to you.”

“Nothing?” Hinata’s small voice questioned.

“Nothing,” Kageyama reiterated. “Ever.”

Hinata closed his eyes and took a deep breath, uncurling himself and sitting on the grass. He continued to sniffle and cry silently for a few moments before he could speak again.

“I shouldn’t have jumped on you,” he whispered.

“It’s fine,” Kageyama replied.

“I spilled your milk.”

“I said it’s fine.”

“I got _scared_.” Kageyama didn’t respond right away and Hinata continued. “When you held me down. I got scared.”

“I’m sorry,” Kageyama said. “I didn’t mean to scare you. I was just messing around.”

“It’s fine,” Hinata said. “I know you’d never hurt me. Intentionally, at least.”

“Let’s go get cleaned up,” Kageyama suggested, standing and holding out his hand. “I’ll explain why we’re late when we get to practice.”

Hinata grabbed his hand and stood. “Can we, maybe... Talk about it?”

Kageyama stared at him dumbly. “Uh, sure, if you’re ready.”

“I-I’m ready,” Hinata decided. “Let’s go to the club room.”

The middle blocker set off toward the building and Kageyama followed close behind. When they entered the club room, Hinata sat down on the floor on the far end and Kageyama sat next to him. Closing his eyes and taking a deep breath, Hinata spoke.

“There was one time,” he said. “When my mom’s boyfriend had me held down. The exact same way you grabbed me.”

“What did he do to you?” Kageyama wasn’t even aware he said the words out loud for a moment before he caught himself. “God, that was a stupid thing to ask. You don’t have to answer-“

“He choked me.”

Kageyama’s head whipped over to look at him.

Hinata continued. “Mostly he just yelled, but he grabbed my throat at some point, too.” The redhead wiped a stray tear. “He didn’t choke me for long, but do you know how _terrifying_ it is for someone to hold you down and squeeze your throat until you can’t breathe?”

The setter found his voice. “No.”

“Good. I hope you never know.”

They heard talking and laughing coming closer to the door and soon it was slammed open. Nishinoya and Tanaka walked through and stopped in their tracks when they saw their juniors.

“Hey! We were just looking for you guys,” Tanaka said. “Looks like our job is done!”

The bald headed second year grabbed Noya by his shirt sleeve and yanked him out the door, Kageyama silently thinking Tanaka in his head. He turned to Hinata, who was wiping his eyes with the heels of his hands.

“Let’s get out of here,” Hinata said. “I’m ready to practice. Race you!”

The spiker shot up and ran out of the room. Spluttering slightly, Kageyama followed with a shout.

“Dumbass!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this was just a thought i had. i wrote this last night and finished it this afternoon. i hope it lives up to the ratings this story has previously gotten. honestly, this is the story that makes me want to pursue writing because of how much praise it’s gotten. im only (almost) 16 though, so i have a few years to think about it.   
> anyways, thank you. so much.


	26. One More

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i’ve been working on this. in secret.

The ball bounced off of Kageyama’s fingertips and soared through the air, Hinata jumping up and smacking it to the floor. The redhead landed his jump and looked at Kageyama, a wide smile on his face.

“One more!” Hinata called.

One more. Hinata said that over and over again and one more turned into two, which turned into five and so on. It was never really one more, was it?

Nonetheless, Kageyama obliged. He tossed the ball up for Hinata one more time and the ginger smacked it back to earth once more. The sound of Hinata’s shoes hitting the floor followed soon after, as well as another request for “one more, Kageyama, _please_!”

“It’s almost ten,” Daichi called. “We need to start wrapping things up.” Hinata pouted and the captain continued. “Let’s go and get food, though, okay? How’s that sound?”

The only thing that got Hinata almost as excited as volleyball was food- specifically the food that could be purchased at Ukai’s family store. Kageyama swore he saw Hinata’s face actually light up while he nodded and dashed to get changed.

By this time it had been a little over two months since Hinata was taken out of that house. Things had been going good, even though Hinata and his father didn’t initially get along well. Recently, though, there hasn’t been as much arguing and fighting between them, which is all Kageyama could’ve hoped for.

After finishing cleaning up the gym, the boys began walking to Ukai’s store. Hinata was bouncing and skipping at the front of the group, Kageyama not far behind him but not walking nearly as enthusiastically. They approached the door to the store and everyone bounded inside, their laughter and chatter erupting throughout the store.

“Pipe down,” Ukai called. “We aren’t even closed yet. Once we close you can make yourselves at home.”

“Tch... Kids,” a voice scoffed from the back of the store.

Kageyama saw Hinata’s head whip to look for the source of the voice, his eyebrows knitting together with worry and eyes going wide. He watched as Hinata looked around the aisles, unseen by the rest of the team who was too enthralled in their conversations and the choices of food. When Hinata laid eyes on the source of the voice, Kageyama saw his face go white and he could practically see all of the air be forcibly drawn from his lungs.

“Hinata?” Kageyama called, starting to walk after him. “Are you-“

Suddenly, Hinata spun and ran toward Kageyama, shoving him aside so hard that he almost fell and running out the door. Their teammates spun in time to see him disappear.

—

Running. Hinata was running and his lungs were burning and he couldn’t see anything around the tears in his eyes. His lungs hurt, he shouldn’t be this out of breath after running for only a little while. Why couldn’t he breathe?

Oh, right, it’s because of that man.

That _goddamn_ man.

Hinata could practically hear the sound of the belt buckle hitting his spine. He could hear the man’s footsteps slamming on the stairs up to Hinata’s room. He could feel the grip of a hand around his throat, squeezing tighter and tighter.

“Shouyou!”

No, no, no, he could hear footsteps behind him. They were heavy and rushed and it sounded like there were multiple people chasing him.

Then, Hinata’s toe hit a curb. The impact sent him positively slamming onto the concrete with a skid, and the ginger could physically feel the skin being torn and ripped where it made contact. In that moment, Hinata just wanted to get up and keep on running, but he couldn’t. He was frozen on the ground and there was some force keeping him there, much like the force that kept him from inhaling or from breathing at all.

“Hinata!”

The footsteps got closer to him and he tensed when he felt hands grabbing him and pulling him up. Suddenly he was no longer on his stomach, but he was sitting upright and looking into Kageyama’s ocean eyes.

“H-He-He’s- He was- He-“ Hinata squeaked.

“I know,” Kageyama replied. “Take a deep breath. Let me look at you.”

Hinata tried to take a breath in while Kageyama grabbed his scraped hands and examined them, then moving onto his skinned knees that were bleeding through the torn fabric of his jeans. Then Kageyama grabbed his face, tilting it up.

“Your chin is bleeding,” he said.

The ginger squeezed his eyes shut. “W-Why was he... Why-Why was h-he th-there?”

“I don’t know,” Kageyama replied. “Can you get up?”

Hinata shakily nodded and let Kageyama help him get to his feet. The setter started to lead him back towards the store, but Hinata wouldn’t budge.

“I don’t want to go back there,” he stammered, voice wavering so badly that he could barely be understood. “I don’t want to, please don’t make me.”

“Okay,” Kageyama said before Hinata could start crying again. “Okay, you’re fine. Take another deep breath.”

Hinata did so with his eyes closed and when he opened them again, he realized that the rest of their team was standing off to the side. Seeing the worried looks on their faces only made Hinata tear up again. He looked down at the ground and gripped Kageyama’s shirt, unknowingly staining it with blood.

“Let’s just get you home,” Kageyama said.

They did. All eleven of his teammates insisted on accompanying Hinata to his house and when they got there, only Hinata, Kageyama, Suga, and Daichi went inside. Hinata’s father shot up from where he sat on the couch.

“Shouyou? What the hell happened?”

Hinata opened his mouth to speak but he just started crying again. Suga wrapped an arm around his shoulders.

“Do you have a first aid kit?” Suga asked.

The man nodded. “In the bathroom.”

Suga led Hinata from the room and Kageyama and Daichi spoke with Hinata’s father.

At some point, Suga got Hinata bandaged up. He remembers the stinging of his scrapes being cleaned and a bandage being pressed under his chin. He remembers hearing his dad’s voice get louder, but with worry, not anger.

Then, Hinata found himself sitting curled up on the couch between Suga and Kageyama while his dad was shouting into the phone. He was just glad that Natsu was sleeping over at a friend’s house so she wouldn’t have to see any of this.

“What do you mean he’s on probation?!” Hinata’s dad was shouting. “You didn’t think it was a good idea to tell me that bastard was in the same town as my son?!” There was a pause. “What the hell am I supposed to do then to keep my kid safe?!”

Hinata put his face in his hands and cried harder.

—

The rest of the evening passed in a blur. At some point the team went home, but Kageyama insisted on staying the night. Hinata’s dad knew and respected Kageyama so he allowed it without a second thought.

That was how Kageyama found himself lying on Hinata’s bed, the redhead lying practically on top of him. Kageyama ran his fingers through Hinata’s hair while Hinata cried, his tears seemingly never ending. At one point, the spiker got particularly distressed and every shallow breath he took turned into a frantic sob.

“Slow down,” Kageyama said. “You need to breathe.”

“C-Ca-Can-n’t,” Hinata cried.

“Breathe in, slowly.” Hinata took in a shallow, shuddering breath. “Try again,” Kageyama said a few seconds later.

“I c-can’t!”

“One more,” Kageyama said, sternly but softly at the same time.

“O-One more?”

“One more,” Kageyama repeated.

Hinata took in another breath, and another, and another. Within a few minutes, the ginger was asleep.

One more. That was the magic request. One more toss, one more breath, one more day to hold on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you guys for reading ;)


	27. Talk To Me, You Dumb Idiot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING for this chapter. stay safe :)

Things seemed to be looking up, and it stayed that way for a while. Hinata smiled, all the time. He laughed at everything- even things that weren’t a joke, he still laughed. He always found something to smile about.

Then, things changed.

Hinata was just becoming so... depressed. Kageyama had no idea why, no idea at all, and Hinata wouldn’t say anything. Literally, he wouldn’t say anything, at all. He just stopped talking- well, he didn’t stop altogether, but his words were few and far between.

It was terrifying.

Kageyama didn’t know what to do. Sometimes, Hinata didn’t even want to play volleyball. He’d be late to practice or just wouldn’t come at all and when he did, he’d be distracted and wouldn’t even be wearing the right practice clothes.

It was a drastic turn for the worse that no one saw coming. One day he was fine and the next he wasn’t. It was obvious from the moment they saw him first thing that day. Everything about him was just... Wrong.

There was one day, Kageyama thought he was the first one to the locker room and just before he walked inside, he stopped. What was that sound? It was almost a wheezing, whimpering sound that kind of sounded like... Hinata? Crying? Upon hearing that sound, a sound he’s heard all too often, Kageyama went inside to find his favorite redhead inside a locked stall.

“Hinata?”

There was a sniffle before a “yeah?” His voice held forced happiness.

“Are you okay?”

“Of course,” he said. “I’m always okay.”

Sirens were going off in Kageyama’s head as he nodded, accepting the answer and going back to the gym. He walked straight to Sugawara and the other setter’s smile fell as soon as he saw the expression on Kageyama’s face.

“Somethings wrong with Hinata,” he said. “Somethings really, really wrong.”

“What do you mean?”

“He was just crying in the bathroom,” Kageyama said. “He won’t tell me what’s wrong and I know you see it, too. Somethings wrong, Suga.”

The silver haired teen looked back at him with sad eyes. “I’ll see what I can do.”

Suga walked past Kageyama and into the bathroom. The blue eyed boy stayed by the door and listened, though he couldn’t hear much until he heard Hinata yelling something like, “You really can’t help me this time!”

The redhead burst out of the bathroom and ran towards the gym doors, racing outside. Suga came out after him and looked at Kageyama, defeated.

They went on with practice. Hinata needed space and Kageyama knew that, but the fact that Daichi wouldn’t let him follow his spiker really put him off. As soon as practice ended, Kageyama took off in a spring towards Hinata’s house. He couldn’t stop thinking about what could possibly be wrong- could his dad be hurting him? Was Kageyama wrong to think that the man wouldn’t do that? Was Hinata even safe right now?

When Kageyama got to the house, he stepped up to the front door and knocked. He heard a few heavy footfalls before the door was opened by none other than Hinata’s father.

“You looking for Shouyou?” The man asked. “He’s up in his room. He’s been pretty moody lately, maybe you can get him to do something other than lock himself in there.”

Kageyama nodded, thanking him quietly as he mounted the steps. Before he reached the top, Natsu called out to him.

“Yama-san!” He turned. “Are you here to fix my brother? He’s always sad. I don’t like it when he’s sad.”

“I’ll try,” he said.

When he approached Hinata’s door, he heard the familiar sound of him crying on the inside.

“Hinata?” He knocked softly. “Hinata, are you okay?” There was no answer. “Why’d you just run off like that? We’re worried about you.”

Upon gaining no response, Kageyama banged harder on the door. Hinata still didn’t answer and the worry kept building up until Kageyama reached down and opened it himself.

Hinata was sitting in the middle of the floor with his back leaning against his bed. His wrists were bleeding and he was staring at them, a razor in his right hand. Kageyama exhaled and surged forward, grabbing the razor carefully and placing it on the nightstand. Hinata looked at him with this look on his face, this empty look that sent shivers down Kageyama’s spine.

“Hinata...” He trailed off. “What... Why?”

“I don’t want to be here,” he said.

“What? Is your dad not good to you? I can see if my parents will-“

“No!” Hinata shouted with a tearful voice. “My dad is great, it’s just... I don’t... I don’t want to be anywhere. I just want... I...”

He scrunched his face up into a pain filled wince and Kageyama knew that it wasn’t from the physical pain, but from the pain in his heart. Heart wrenching sobs rang out and Kageyama leaned forward, collecting the decoy into a hug and holding him tight.

“I know,” he whispered. “It’ll be okay.”

“No it won’t.”

“Yes it will.”

“It won’t.”

“It _will_ , stupid!”

Hinata was silent then. Kageyama continued to hold him until they both calmed down.

“It will,” Kageyama continued. “Because this is just another storm. The storm before was the kind that wiped everything out, made it so that nowhere was safe and that things were so so hopeless. This storm is the kind that only really affects a few people, the kind that is hard to predict but is a storm all the same. They’re both storms that are bad, and maybe the damage from the storm before was worse than we thought. Maybe some roofs got blown off some houses and those are still being fixed, but they _can_ be fixed. They can. No matter what kind of storm there is, we can come back from it. You know that.”

Hinata took a shuddering breath and he and Kageyama unraveled themselves from each other. They both had blood on them.

“I’m going to call your dad up here,” Kageyama said. “He’s going to make sure you get the help you need.”

Hinata put up a fight at that, but Kageyama went over his head and called him upstairs. When the man walked in, he was angry at first, but the anger soon gave way and revealed fear. It was a fear that Kageyama didn’t realize the man was capable of until he saw it on his face and for the first time that Kageyama saw, Hinata’s father crushed his son in a huge hug. His face was still stern, but the way he embraced his son showed that he never wanted to let him go.

“With all due respect,” Kageyama began. “I’m staying over. It’s not that I don’t trust you to keep him safe, it’s that I don’t trust him to let you.”

“Fair enough,” the man said. “I’m calling your doctor, Shouyou. Go clean those and put band-aids on them. I’ll be back later.”

That night, Kageyama climbed into Hinata’s bed with him, laying so they were facing each other like they’d done on other nights. They didn’t lay close to each other, but Hinata just seemed comforted by the fact that he could feel Kageyama’s weight pressing down on the other side of the bed. Kageyama had already told his parents he was staying and he’d helped Hinata bandage himself up, so there was only one thing left to do.

“Was there a trigger?” He left an empty space for Hinata to answer but resumed when he didn’t. “Like, did something happen recently to make you want to do this?”

“There’s...” The decoy hesitated. “There’s this guy... He’s in our year, and I guess somehow he and a bunch of other people know about what was happening with my mom, and he said some things.”

“Things... Like what?”

“Things about how...” Hinata’s eyes teared up. “How it was no wonder why she couldn’t deal with me, or how...” His voice was now thick with tears. “How if he was my parent, he’d beat me too.”

Kageyama watch Hinata once again screw his eyes shut. He resisted the urge to grab him and hug him close, instead using his words.

“People like that are messed up,” he said. “You know that. I know that you’ve had insult after insult drilled into your head but you’re a good person. You really are. You’re kind and you’re funny and you make people happy. The people who think otherwise don’t matter.”

Hinata took a self soothing breath. “Thank you,” he said. “Just... Keep telling me that, okay?”

“Okay,” Kageyama said. “I will, as long as you keep talking to me, you dumb idiot. Don’t ever hurt yourself again.”

Hinata closed his eyes. “I’ll try.”

There was a faint smile on Hinata’s tear stained face and Kageyama watched until it relaxed while he drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i have one more chapter planned, and i think it’s the ending you all have been waiting for for so long. after that, there may be a sequel with more storms, or earthquakes, or hurricanes. i can’t tell yet. i’ll let you know if i have a plan in mind ;)  
> also ideally hinata’s dad would take him to the ER or something for a psych eval of some sort because he’s a great risk to himself so if you or someone you know is self harming, get them help and make sure they’re S A F E


	28. Newsflash: You’re Gay

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TRIGGER WARNING for homophobia and self hate and stuff :((  
> EDIT: it won’t let me do italics without glitching out on me so i’ll try to fix it later

It was shaping up to be a good week. Hinata’s first appointment with his therapist went well and while he wasn’t too happy about being put on antidepressants, he could already feel them helping. The thing he liked the most about his therapist was that they didn’t jump right into stories about the abuse. They were just getting to know each other.

 

He hadn’t hurt himself in a while, either. Not that a therapist and some pills takes all of his problems away, but he was working really hard at opening up to Kageyama.

 

Speaking of Kageyama, where was he? Hinata had been waiting at their lunch spot for almost ten minutes before the setter finally came. He sat next to Hinata with a pensive look on his face.

 

“What’s wrong with you?” Hinata asked.

 

“I’m just thinking,” Kageyama replied.

 

“You? Thinking? You look constipated.”

 

Kageyama smacked his arm and Hinata snorted. The redhead continued to eat his lunch while Kageyama stared up at the sky. What was bothering him so much? Could it be...

 

Hinata rolled up his sleeves. “You don’t need to be worried,” he said. “See? Look- I haven’t been hurting myself.”

 

Kageyama stared down at the still healing cuts and sighed. “That’s good, but that’s not... Hinata, I need to tell you something.”

 

Hinata’s stomach did a flip. “Yeah?”

 

His setter turned and grabbed his hands, looking into his eyes.

 

“I think I love you.”

 

A leaf fell from the tree above them. A bird took off from its spot on a branch, causing the limb to shake and the leaves to rustle. Hinata was frozen.

 

“What?”

 

“I-If you don’t feel the same way, that’s fine, I just need to-“

 

“I’m not gay.” The words were falling from Hinata’s lips before he even knew what he was saying. “I’m not a- I’m not a fag, Kageyama! Why would you think that?!”

 

He was standing now, and the horror in Kageyama’s sad eyes broke Hinata’s heart.

 

“Hinata-“ Kageyama started, but the spiker didn’t give him the time.

 

He ran-

 

Who is that, your boyfriend?

 

-And ran-

 

Faggot.

 

-And ran some more. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t do this, not with a boy, not with Kageyama, just no.

 

Hinata then found himself in the bathroom on the opposite end of the school. He dashed inside and locked himself in a stall, curling up on himself. He couldn’t be gay. He couldn’t. It was- it was weird. It was wrong.

 

Oh, no, what if he was gay? God, he was disgusting. He didn’t deserve Kageyama, he didn’t deserve anyone.

 

Hinata’s fingers itched. His wrists burned. He wanted to hurt himself. His body was longing for the pain he’d become familiar with, he needed it. He needed it.

 

There was nothing around, nothing sharp, even in Hinata’s pockets, so he balled his hands up into fists and slammed them into his head. He pulled his hair. He used his nails- God, he just needed to hurt himself because he was so messed up and he couldn’t-

 

“Hinata?”

 

He looked up. There were footsteps outside the stall door.

 

“Hinata, I know you’re in here.” It was Suga’s voice. “Kageyama told me. Do you need to talk?”

 

Hinata stood and opened the stall door, Suga looking at him with a sad, worried expression.

 

“I...” Hinata could barely speak. “What did I do?” He sobbed. “He’s gonna hate me- oh God, what did I do?”

 

He was reduced to tears and Suga rushed forward, grabbing him as he fell to his knees. Suga wrapped his arms around him in a comforting embrace and Hinata was engulfed in warmth.

 

“You’re okay,” Suga said. “You’re fine, he’ll understand.”

 

“No, he can’t understand,” Hinata said. “His parents love him, they’d never call him gay like it was a bad thing. They’d never call him a fag while beating him and calling him a bitch when he cried. He can’t understand. He can’t understand why I can’t be gay, I can’t, Suga, I can’t, I-“

 

He was sobbing and Suga hushed him, running his hand through his hair.

 

“He knows how bad they treated you,” he consoled. “He knows that you’d never say anything like that and actually mean it. That doesn’t mean that it didn’t hurt, though.”

 

“Oh, God, I’m awful,” he said, staring at his wrists. “I’m awful and I don’t want to- I don’t-“ He sobbed once more, his nails connecting with his skin and digging in.

 

“Hey, stop that!” Suga grabbed his hands and held them. “Stop. You can’t just hurt yourself whenever you’re upset.”

 

“But Suga, I’m awful, I can’t believe I said those things to him. I’m no better than my mom!”

 

“Hinata, you’re nothing like your mother. You’ve got to know that.”

 

He just cried after that. All this time he was terrified of becoming like his mother and now he felt like he was.

 

Eventually he couldn’t cry anymore. Hinata was tired, and his eyes were swollen and stinging when he blinked, and his head hurt from all the sobbing. Suga got him to stand and walked with him to class. He was late, but Suga talked to Hinata’s teacher upon walking into the room.

 

Kageyama wasn’t there.

 

He wasn’t in their next class, either. Hinata didn’t see him again until the end of the day and his setter’s eyes were red and his cheeks were blotchy and shit, Hinata did that, he made him cry and Kageyama never cried. Hinata couldn’t bring himself to approach him, he couldn’t do it because he was so ashamed, he didn’t deserve Kageyama as a friend or anything else.

 

“Hinata?”

 

He jumped out of his skin when Kageyama’s voice penetrated his thoughts.

 

“I-I-I’m s-“ Hinata spluttered.

 

“Are you okay?” Kageyama looked at him with more sincerity than Hinata ever thought he was capable of.

 

“What?” Hinata gasped.

 

“Are you alright?” Kageyama repeated.

 

“Y-Yes,” Hinata said. “Are you?”

 

“Uh- Yeah. Listen, I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable, you don’t need to-“

 

“Stop,” Hinata said. “Stop, I just...” There were more tears. “I’m so s-sorry, Kageyama, I shouldn’t have said those things and I really like you, I do, but I don’t deserve you, I’m the worst and I can’t- I-“

 

“Wait,” Kageyama said. “Shut up for a second. You’re not the worst, and you need to stop putting yourself down.”

 

“But I called you a fag, Kageyama,” Hinata cried. “I can’t believe I said that.”

 

“You didn’t mean it,” Kageyama said. “You didn’t mean it and I know that.”

 

“I still said it,” Hinata mumbled.

 

Kageyama raised an eyebrow. “So what, are you saying you meant it?”

 

“No!”

 

“Then it’s okay,” Kageyama said calmly. “Listen to me. I forgive you. Let me forgive you.”

 

Hinata spring forward, hugging Kageyama’s waist. “I’m sorry.”

 

“I forgive you,” Kageyama said.

 

“I’m really sorry.”

 

“I really forgive you.”

 

“I like you.”

 

“I like you, too.”

 

“No, I like-like you,” Hinata said, avoiding looking at Kageyama’s face.

 

There was no answer. Kageyama was completely still and when Hinata looked up at him, he was crying.

 

“Don’t cry,” Hinata begged. “Please, I’m sorry-“

 

“I’m happy,” Kageyama said. “I’m crying because I’m happy, and I love you.”

 

Then, Kageyama kissed him. It was soft, so gentle and chaste that Hinata couldn’t even believe it was Kageyama kissing him. The contrast between the gentleness of the kiss and Kageyama’s usual roughness was great, so great that it almost made Hinata uncomfortable and made him press his own lips into Kageyama’s so that it felt more... Kageyama-like.

 

When Kageyama pulled away, Hinata felt himself let out a whine. He didn’t mean to, but he needed this- this closeness, this feeling of being loved, because it was a warmth Hinata didn’t think he’d ever felt before. Kageyama pressed their lips together once again and Hinata could feel that he was smiling but the spiker couldn’t smile, himself, because he was feeling too many emotions at once and he’d already cried so many times today, what was one more?

 

After that, Kageyama slept over a lot. They spent many nights sleeping next to each other but this time, they were cuddled together instead of awkwardly lying next to each other.

 

Hinata never wanted this to change.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> can you guys give me some prompts?? i can’t promise that i’ll get to all of them but i just would love to know what you guys would like to see ;)

**Author's Note:**

> hope you liked it! check out my other works!


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